Twisting the Teleidoscope
by somethingtrippedme
Summary: Kurt's world is rocked when an old friend of Blaine's turns up in Lima.
1. Chapter One

As silly as it seemed Blaine couldn't shake the feeling that he was being followed. He found his hands shaking slightly as they returned once again to his striped tie, readjusting it out of apprehension more than necessity. He had traveled these hallways enough to know that the dull clunking of shoes behind him was just his echo, but he was on guard nonetheless. Despite the welcoming glow of the sun on the wooden walls and the upbeat hum of the Warblers in the distance, a tiny voice in the back of his head was screaming at Blaine to turn back, but he couldn't. He had to find Kurt.

A door slammed loudly from somewhere behind him. Blaine whirled around.

"Kurt?"

No one was there. Blaine quickened his pace as he continued to the choir room up ahead. Suddenly a strong sense of guilt gripped him, as if he was trespassing somewhere highly off limits. But that was silly. This was Dalton, this was his school. In the two years he attended he never once felt unwelcomed by anyone. So why did he have the feeling that this was the last place he should be?

When he reached the door at the end of the hallway he noticed the Warblers had stopped singing. The handle of the choir room slipped from his clammy hands, but after a hasty swipe over his blazer Blaine got a decent enough grasp to open the door. The only question was did he really want to? Why had the other side become so silent? Even in-between songs the Warblers were never this quiet. He didn't hear Wes dishing out any announcements, or furniture being moved to make more performance space, or even Jeff snickering to himself like he always did in uncomfortable silences.

What were they doing in there?

Blaine drew in a short breath and opened the door. He was expecting to see everyone gazing up at him in a muted surprise, but to his disbelief he found the room completely empty.

Was he going crazy? Hadn't he heard them practicing a moment ago? They couldn't have vanished into thin air. Blaine jogged down the steps and searched the room frantically. He checked behind the leather sofas and under the tables, but no one was there. If they were pulling a prank on him it was the best one he had ever seen. The only way out of the choir room was through the door he just opened; there was no way they could have got passed without him seeing.  
>If the Warblers were gone that meant that Kurt had vanished too. His heart jolted violently. What was going on?<p>

Something moved by the window in the far corner of the room. At first he assumed it was a shadow from a bird flying past the window, but as he approached he saw it again. Something brown had fallen from the ceiling. Blaine squinted and kneeled down in front of the windowpane. A small piece of wood rested on the rug. Curious, he picked it up and turned it over in his grasp. It was warm.

Another chunk of wood thumped lightly onto the floor beside him. Blaine furrowed his eyebrows and grabbed the new piece. This one was warmer than the first. Almost as soon as he picked it up another chunk fell, and then another. Blaine frowned and looked up at the ceiling.

"What the hell?" he whispered, standing slowly.

A small crack stared back at him. It began at the floor near the window and ran up the corner of the walls and onto the ceiling. But it wasn't the crack itself that caught Blaine off guard, it was that the crack was still forming. With a high pitched whine the dark line jumped a little further into the room, shaking down small splinters of wood and drywall. Blaine backed away carefully, keeping his eye on the fracture. With each step he took the walls groaned louder and the crack became thicker, extending just as far into the room as Blaine was standing.

It was following him.

He sprinted for the door. An earsplitting shriek emitted from within the crack. Hunks of debris large enough to squash him flat hurdled down around him as the room fell apart. The door was just a few feet in front of him. If he could get out of this room he might have a chance to make it to the emergency exit in the hallway.

The floor shuddered violently as he ran. Furniture whipped into his path. To his left books sprang from the wall and hurtled across the room. He threw his hands over his head as he ran in a feeble attempt to protect himself, but just as he reached the tiny set of stairs at the door something heavy collided with his shoulder, throwing him onto his back.

The crack bellowed ominously above, and even though his eyes were squeezed shut in pain Blaine knew that it had caught up with him. He cried out desperately for someone, anyone, to save him. A chandelier crashed down on his legs, pinning his body. Frantically Blaine opened his eyes and saw that the entire ceiling was now consumed by the void.

He didn't know what he expected to see inside the crack; pipes, insulation, the under workings of the floor above, but all he saw was red. A thick, warm red that was now showering down as the room crumbled around him. The color filled the remains of the choir room quickly, and before he knew what was happening he found himself gasping for air. If he didn't get up he was going to drown in the red. Blaine screamed louder than he ever thought possible. Try as he might the chandelier wouldn't budge. The color filled the room like a tub, its warmth puddling around his mangled body. Blaine couldn't move. All he could do was scream at the void above him, and the void screamed back. He shrieked as the warmth of the red invaded his ears and climbed up his face. Soon it oozed into his mouth, muffling his cries. It was so thick and warm and had such a coppery taste.

_It's blood._

Blaine gave one last horrified cry.

The walls were bleeding, and he was drowning in it.

* * *

><p>Grey clouds hung low to the ground threatening rain or snow, neither of which would have been a surprise to the shoppers that bustled through the streets below. It was a typical Saturday during late November in Lima. This time of year brought swarms of people to the shopping district with promises of early sales and affordable Christmas decorations, a strong enough motivator to brave the brisk Ohio weather.<p>

The couple shoved their way through the sea of shoppers, hands locked firmly so they wouldn't lose each other. After one too many snags between other people's bodies Blaine settled on lifting his shopping bags high above his head to keep from losing them. Kurt, on the other hand, was carrying so many bags that he barely managed to keep them from dragging on ground.

"Are we there yet?" Kurt yelled over the roar of the crowd.

"Just about," Blaine called back. "Do you need me to carry some of that for you?"

Kurt winced as they heaved themselves between a pack of burly men blocking the sidewalk, his bags swinging harshly into their calves. One of the men scolded, but Kurt was propelled so quickly past him by the flow of the crowd that he wasn't able to apologize.

"No, I just need to readjust my hold."

Blaine walked on tip toe for a moment to get a better look over the crowd.

"There's a clearing to the left just ahead, think you can make it?"

A pack of kids pushed past the couple, each seeming to take special care to trample over Kurt's fancy new boots.

"I've made it this far," he grumbled.

After a great deal of stopping and shoving, Blaine gently yanked his boyfriend into a small clearing under the awning of a shop.

"Here, put those down for a second," he cooed, setting his own bags onto the pavement. He helped Kurt untangle his forearm from the mass of plastic handles and strings and moved the shopping bags deeper under the awning so they wouldn't get trampled by the crowd. Kurt grasped his newly freed wrist and flexed his hand slowly. His knuckles were bone white and his fingers throbbed in pain.

"What happened to a little light shopping?" Blaine teased, taking Kurt's hand in his and massaging it gently.

"What happened to not letting me within a hundred feet Nordstrom?"

"Hey you were the one who pointed out the sign for the scarf sale."

"Only because you let me wander close enough to read it. One hundred feet, Blaine."

Blaine smiled and kissed Kurt's fingers. "In my defense, that sign was huge. I've seen smaller billboards than that sign."

"Yeah," Kurt grinned, "But scarves are kind of a big deal, so it's excusable."

"It's only excusable if you let me carry some of that stuff for you."

Kurt nodded his head. "Think we can rest for a minute first?"

Blaine scanned the street. Even if there were any open benches they would be impossible to reach through the crowd. Just as he turned back to face Kurt his eye caught a small wooden sign outside the awning they were standing under.

**Milton's Antiques and Treasures**

Blaine read the words aloud. "Let's go inside."

Kurt narrowed his eyes and scanned the glass window behind him. "And risk leaving smelling of old people and furniture polish?"

"You'll be fine," Blaine laughed, "And who knows, they might have a really nice Victorian bedroom set or something. We'll go in just long enough to warm up and let the crowd thin out a little and then we'll head back to your place."

With a smug smile Kurt gathered his bags and opened the door.

"You had me at Victorian."

* * *

><p>The old lady at the front desk was kind enough to let them set their shopping bags up front with her while they looked around, which ended up being much longer than they intended. Containing mostly a bunch of old knickknacks and paintings, Blaine was more enthusiastic about the shop than Kurt was, but Kurt couldn't say he wasn't just a little captivated by it all. They walked around the half-hazardly constructed aisles slowly, cracking jokes and admiring the odds and ends. After a while Blaine came across a polo book from the thirties, which he instantly absorbed himself in, leaving Kurt to wander the store alone.<p>

Without his boyfriend rambling in his ear over the history of everything they came across and gushing over the likelihood of this or that being found in Ohio of all places, Kurt found himself less captivated by the commodities and more fascinated by how everything looked like it was painted in a permanent layer of dust.

After fifteen minutes of trying to maintain his interest in the shop Kurt began wishing Blaine would put down the book and join him, but the odds of that happening soon were slim, so he decided to look for a place to sit down.

Figuring the front of the store was only reserved for the trinkets and gaudy jewelry Kurt made his way to the back, which he discovered was a bit more appealing. There were dressers with attractive curves, porcelain tea sets displayed in curio cabinets, and a vast variety of Oakwood tables. The furthest wall was lined with Grandfather clocks and mirrors, all of which he could imagine Carol falling in love with. And there in the corner surrounded by hanging lamps and sewing mannequins, sat the most beautiful vanity Kurt had ever seen. Edwardian, mahogany, curves that put Marilyn Monroe to shame, and bigger than the size of his bathroom -with an even bigger price tag he was sure- Kurt was convinced it was made specifically for him and him alone. He held his breath and sat on the stool. There wasn't a sign urging him not to sit there but he felt a little guilty all the same, like he was sitting on something that belonged to a museum. Gingerly he ran his fingers over its polished surface and carefully played with the drawers, imagining where he would put his products if it were his. As he immersed himself in all the possibilities Blaine snuck up behind him and draped himself around his shoulders. Kurt jumped.

"Don't scare me like that."

Blaine chucked in his ear and held out a rectangular black box.

"I know you've been melancholy. I don't pretend to know why," he said in a nasally accent.

Kurt bit back a grin and watched Blaine through the mirror.

"I intended to save this until the engagement gala next week," Blaine emphasized each word with ample face expressions, "But I thought, tonight."

He opened the black box in front of Kurt, revealing a hideous pearl necklace. The chain was tarnished and the tacky blue paint on the beads was badly chipped. Pearls were missing in odd places and the whole thing looked like it was the sole survivor of some nuclear attack on an old lady's house.

"Good gracious!" Kurt gasped dramatically, clutching his hand to his chest.

"Think of this as a reminder of my feelings for you." Blaine held up the necklace and placed it around Kurt's neck. Kurt grimaced at the image of it in the mirror but kept up the charade nonetheless. He liked it when Blaine was playful.

"Is it a-"

"Diamond? Of course not." Blaine snorted, "It's pearl. Twenty six pearls to be exact. Although I suspect it used to have thirty before some dog got a hold of it."

"It's overwhelming." Kurt sighed, mocking his face in awe.

"Well it's for old people," Blaine rolled his eyes buoyantly. "We're not old people, Kurt."

Kurt chucked and examined their reflections in the vanity mirror. Blaine gazed back at him with a smile and rested his head on Kurt's shoulder. They stared at each other for a while, eyes sparkling from the dim light of the lamps above and the admiration they shared for one another. Kurt watched Blaine's toothy smile fade into a small grin, his eyes –bright as ever- glanced slowly over Kurt's reflection. The profound lines of laughter on his face smoothed away as Blaine gazed steadily at him, loosing himself in his boyfriend's features. Kurt knew this look. It was the same one that came over his face after they made love. He felt the blush rise in his cheeks. Blaine didn't voice that he loved Kurt all the time like some couples do, but he didn't have to. What were three meager words compared to this look of marvel and adoration?

"You know there's nothing I couldn't give you," Blaine whispered.

Kurt closed his eyes, allowing himself to get lost in the moment. The warmth of Blaine's breath felt so good on his ear. Blaine pressed his lips lightly on Kurt's neck, rising goose bumps from his skin. No matter how many times he kissed him Kurt didn't think he'd ever get used to the softness of his lips. Dreamily Kurt found himself thinking he would give anything to sit like this forever. Just the two of them taking shelter from the cold and chaos of the world, Blaine nuzzled close whispering sweet nothings into his ear.

Blaine took Kurt's chin and turned it to his. "There's nothing I'd ever deny you," he breathed, closing the space between their lips.

A warm wave of static pulsed through Kurt's body. God he wanted him. Right here, right now, damn anyone who saw. Kurt moaned and reached his hand around Blaine's head, pulling him in. A small whimper echoed in Blaine's throat, throwing Kurt into overdrive. He dipped his tongue into Blaine's mouth with urgency.

Sensing his boyfriend's eagerness Blaine broke away quickly and smiled, "Except this god awful necklace."

Kurt's eyes fluttered open. "And a proper kiss," he whined as Blaine stood.

Blaine scrunched his face playfully and kissed Kurt on the cheek. "Just wait until we get home."

Blaine released the clasp on the necklace and placed it back in the box.

"It really is hideous," Kurt said.

"One man's trash," Blaine tisked, "I'm going to put this back."

The butterflies in Kurt's stomach still lingered after Blaine left. He should have known better than to think Blaine would attempt any serious public displays of affection with him. Holding hands and sneaking small kisses at the movies never bothered him, but making out was strictly off-limits. Blaine always excused it as being improper, but Kurt knew better.

With a heavy sigh he left the vanity and continued browsing. A chaise lounge on the other side of the store caught his eye next. He perched himself lightly on it, taking in the silky fabric and fine detail. The pattern would be a great accent to the color of his walls. A price tag was taped to the arm but Kurt decided he didn't want to know how much it cost. If it was reasonable enough he might just buy it.

Blaine bounded from around the hastily put together aisle and stopped mid-step when he saw Kurt on the chaise. A crafty grin spread across his face.

"Too bad I left my sketch book and charcoal in the car."

Kurt glared at his boyfriend and patted the space next to him. "I think that's enough Titanic references for the day."

"You can never have too many Titanic references." Blaine sat down and nudged Kurt playfully with his shoulder.

Kurt rolled his eyes. Before he could retort he noticed Blaine was holding something.

"What's that?"

Blaine smiled warmly and held up a brass tube. As far as Kurt was concerned it could have been scrap metal from his dad's tire shop, but Blaine looked at it as if it was a piece of treasure.

"It's a teleidoscope," he said fondly, turning the brass cylinder in his hand. "I used to love playing with these things when I was a kid."

Kurt cocked an eyebrow. "Don't you mean kaleidoscope?"

"No, I mean a _teleidoscope_, with a _T_. Take it."

"What's the difference?" Kurt took the teleidoscope and examined it. On one end was a small eyepiece and on the other a clear bubble of glass. He held it up to his face and peeked through the hole.

"Kaleidoscopes are typically made with beads or oil, so when you look through them you see a pallet of color. Teleidoscopes, on the other hand, have a glass marble at the end that you can see through. That way you can look at me, for example," Blaine turned the teleidoscope in his direction, "and make designs out of my face."

Hundreds of Blaines smiled at Kurt through the lens in varying angles. He grinned at the sight and moved closer to Blaine's face. Normally Blaine's eyes took his breath away when there were only two of them, but now there were thousands. Thousands of hazel gems glittering in his eye.

"It's beautiful."

"You know what the best part is? Just when you think you've found the perfect pattern, one little twist makes it even better."

Blaine turned the tube in Kurt's hand. The color of his irises exploded into gold and green fireworks, completely drowning out his pupils. Kurt smiled as Blaine continued to rotate the teleidoscope, skewing and blending his eyes into gorgeous motifs. Blaine watched Kurt's face carefully as he did so, absorbing every small flash of delight and awe. They sat silently for a while, save small giggles from Kurt, each lost in the beauty of the other.

When Blaine twisted the tube one last time the warm colors of his irises suddenly eroded into a sea of black and red.

Kurt took in a sharp breath and jumped back.

"You okay?" Blaine asked, setting down the teleidoscope.

"I-I'm fine. Your pupils just caught me off guard that time."

"I guess a twist can also change it for the worse." Blaine shrugged.

"I guess," Kurt muttered, but he wasn't so sure. He examined his boyfriend's eyes carefully. The black of Blaine's pupils wasn't like the black he just saw. That shade had been deeper, more menacing. And where had the splashes of red come from? There was nothing red about his eyes. Blaine wasn't even wearing red today so it couldn't have been a trick of the mirrors. Kurt spared the toy a hesitant glance before getting up from the lounge and offering Blaine his hand.

"We should get going, it's late."

* * *

><p>The crowd had thinned out enough that the couple could walk side-by-side without fear of losing each other, but they held hands anyway. Blaine carried most of Kurt's shopping bags for him so Kurt could put his free hand in his coat pocket to keep warm, which Kurt was more than thankful for; it was freezing outside.<p>

As they made their way back to Blaine's SUV Kurt noticed a cluster of jocks from McKinley smoking outside the theater a few blocks ahead. He tightened his grip on Blaine's hand.

"What's the quickest way to the car again?"

"The way we're heading, why?"

Blaine noticed the look of concern on Kurt's face and followed his gaze to the theater.

"Do you know those guys?"

"They go to my school," Kurt muttered.

Blaine stopped walking. He wasn't stupid. Most of Kurt's problems came from the jocks at his high school, and even from this distance he could make out the letterman jackets.

"We could find another way to go if you don't want to walk past them."

Kurt took a deep breath in through his nose and readjusted his grip on Blaine's hand.

"No. If this is the quickest way back then I want to go this way. Maybe they'll go inside by the time we pass."

Blaine nodded silently and continued to walk, but his insides collapsed into a slush of nerves. Something was urging him to find another way to go. But he couldn't. He had a feeling Kurt only wanted to continue past the jocks because Blaine was with him, and after all that talk about standing up to bullies and facing fears he would look like a coward if he suggested turning back now. Instead he turned to Kurt and struck up a conversation about how much Christmas shopping he still had left to do. If he acted like they had nothing to worry about Kurt would feel more at ease, and that's all that mattered.

Kurt caught on to the 'ignore them and they'll ignore us' charade his boyfriend was putting on right away, but his eyes kept darting nervously toward the group as they drew closer. Blaine squeezed his hand. "Hey, don't pay any attention to those guys. Focus on me," he whispered, "Don't look away from my eyes."

Kurt swallowed hard and kept his eyes locked on Blaine's. Blaine began rambling again to keep up appearance as they approached. The jocks hearty laughter stopped when they noticed the couple walking hand-in-hand. Kurt felt the weight of their eyes watching them. His heart beat quickened and Blaine gripped his hand reassuringly. One of the taller jocks blew smoke from his cigarette in their faces as they passed with a cruel smirk. Kurt coughed in the cloud of chemicals. He didn't mean to, he really didn't. His body reacted before he had time to stop it. It wasn't a whooping cough, or even a loud one, just a small wheeze from the smoke hitting his throat through his parted lips. The jock however, took it offensively.

"What'd you say, Tinkerbelle?"

Kurt kept his eyes fixed on Blaine, but Blaine had stopped talking. His face grew dark and he stared intensely at the ground.

"Hey you little faggot, I asked you a question."

Blaine slowed his pace, a far off look in his eyes.

"Just keep walking." Kurt muttered.

"Yeah Peter Pan, keep walking. Maybe if you do what Tink says he'll shower you in his pixie dust tonight."

Blaine stopped abruptly. His shoulders tensed and his grip on both the shopping bags and Kurt's hand tightened painfully. That's when Kurt realized that he had never heard anyone harass Blaine before. Anxious, Kurt yanked his hand to get him moving again, but he wouldn't budge. Why did he stop? Was he planning to turn around and say something? There were six of them; Blaine was crazy if he thought he could take them all. They'd tear him to shreds.

"Blaine, please," Kurt pulled more forcefully. Blaine looked up from the ground and stared at Kurt with an expression Kurt couldn't quite decipher, like he was terrified yet pleading for him to let him fight.

"Please baby, don't." Kurt whispered."The car's just across the street. Let's go home."

Blaine searched Kurt's eyes with the same hard, far off look and after what seemed like an eternity began walking again. The jocks shouted a few more insults at them before returning to their cigarettes. Kurt sighed and held onto Blaine's hand with both of his as they crossed the empty street. They walked quietly for a long time, Blaine lost in his thoughts and Kurt lost on what Blaine could be thinking. Blaine looked anxious; repeatedly glancing over his shoulder long after the group of boys disappeared into the theater. But he didn't voice any concern. When the silence became too much to take Kurt cleared his throat.

"Are you okay?"

Blaine furrowed his eyebrows together, thinking hard.

"Yeah," he said slowly.

"I didn't realize how much they would get to you. If I had known we would have walked across the street when I first saw them."

"What? No Kurt, it's not your fault. And it's not what they said that's bothering me right now. Do you honestly think I'm not strong enough to let a few stupid words roll off my shoulder?"

Kurt cocked his eyebrow."What is it then?"

"I just- I'm sorry, Kurt. I had this really weird dream last night and I… All day I've had this feeling that something huge was going to happen. I've had all this anticipation building up inside of me and I didn't know why. For a moment I thought those jerks back there had to be the reason behind it, like they were going to attack us or something, but I guess I was wrong. The feeling's still there. Now I'm just anxious to figure out what it is."

"If it's anything at all," Kurt smiled. "You know I've had days like that too, Blaine. It's called having too much caffeine. Maybe you should lay off the coffee for a while?"

Blaine grinned and pulled Kurt's hands to his mouth, kissing his knuckles.

"And risk missing out on dates with you after school? Never."

* * *

><p>Kurt sat in the SUV while Blaine put the shopping bags in the trunk. As he shifted the bags he already had around to make room for more his phone vibrated in his pocket. A number he didn't recognize lit the screen.<p>

"Hello?"

"I'm calling for Blaine Anderson," a smooth voice answered.

Kurt looked over his shoulder from the passenger seat with a curious expression.

"Who is it?" he mouthed.

Blaine shrugged and began securing the shopping bags in the trunk.

"Speaking."

"Blaine, it's Julian."

Blaine dropped one of the bags, spilling its contents over the asphalt. Kurt shot him an appalled glare but he didn't notice.

"Get out," he grinned slowly. "Julian, Julian Ira?"

"The one and only."

Blaine laughed ecstatically and ran his hand through his hair in disbelief. Kurt cocked his eyebrow.

"Julian? You've got to be kidding me! How did you get my number?"

"How did I get your number, really? You haven't heard from me in two years and that's the first thing you're asking? I'm disappointed in you Blaine."

Kurt listened inquisitively as Blaine talked on the phone. He couldn't recall a time when his boyfriend ever sounded so happy, which was a pretty impressive feat. Who the hell was he talking to?

When Blaine finished packing everything into the car he shut the trunk and paced around the parking lot eagerly. Kurt watched carefully from the passenger seat. He was never one to get jealous over Blaine's friends, but now seemed like an opportune time to start. Blaine was so happy to be talking to whoever was on the other line that he almost looked insane. His eyes were wide and beaming and his goofy smile stretched a little too close to his ears to look normal. In fact he almost looked comical, if not a little demonic. At one point in the conversation Blaine got so excited that his joyful pace around the hood of the car turned into some strange dance. Kurt's cheeks flushed. Whoever he was talking to was making Blaine look like a complete idiot and Kurt couldn't bear to watch anymore. It was embarrassing. He turned his attention to the radio with a sneer, thinking that if he ever met the person on the other line he'd slap them in the face for making his boyfriend loose his sense of decency. But as he skimmed through the stations Kurt couldn't help but wonder if Blaine ever paced and danced around when he was on the phone with him.

Kurt had time to listen to four songs before Blaine finally hung up and bounded into the car. He practically bounced in the driver's seat when he got in, and Kurt briefly considered the possibility that he wasn't fit to drive.

"So!" Kurt sang loudly, "What's the cause of super-hyper Blaine? Should I be just as excited as you or should I be terrified? Because honestly, you're really scaring me right now."

Blaine started his engine and beamed at Kurt. He opened his mouth to say something but in his excitement all he could do was laugh. Not just casually laugh. Blaine was hysterical. He rested his head against the steering wheel and laughed for so long that tears formed in his eyes. The concerned look on Kurt's face only made him laugh harder.

"Kurt I-I'm sorry it's just-"

But Blaine couldn't control his laughter. He leaned his head against his window and closed his eyes in an effort to compose himself, but for some reason he only laughed harder. And like yawns tend to do, Kurt found himself suppressing the urge to laugh too, although he couldn't tell if he wanted to laugh alongside Blaine, or at him, or out of fear. Five whole minutes passed before Blaine's laughter -which now sounded more like cries of pain- began to subside, but he stayed like that for a while, goofy grinned and giggly. Kurt had to stop himself from laughing again at how crazy he looked; if he started now it might rile Blaine up again.

The rain that had been threatening to fall all day began to thud loudly on the windshield. The noise seemed to sober Blaine up a little. His silly grin slipped into a small smile as he watched the thick pellets drip down the glass.

"You know how I said I thought something big was going to happen today," he said finally.

Kurt released a breath he didn't know he was holding. For a while he didn't think he'd ever hear Blaine speak normally again. He loved seeing Blaine happy, but not so happy that he couldn't bring himself to talk, especially when Kurt didn't know what the hell he was so excited about.

"Yeah, I remember."

"This must have been it."

Kurt raised his eyebrows for further explanation but Blaine wasn't looking at him. His eyes were transfixed on the window.

"And what might this be?"

Blaine smiled a little wider and sat up.

"Julian's coming back."

Kurt felt his body go ridged. All this giddiness was over a boy?

"Julian?"

"Yeah, he's a close friend of mine from school."

"Funny, I don't recall anyone named Julian going to Dalton," Kurt spat.

"No, not from Dalton," Blaine buckled his seat belt and threw the car into reverse. "He went to Cottingham, my first high school. He was my best friend."

There was a pull at Kurt's stomach. Blaine hardly ever mentioned his old high school, let alone any friends he may have had there.

"Well he must be something special to make you to act like this."

The rain picked up as Blaine pulled out of the parking lot.

"Julian? Yeah, he's great."

"If he's so great then why haven't you mentioned him before?"

"I guess I never felt compelled to." Blaine shrugged.

"Oh really, why's that?"

Blaine frowned and turned up his windshield wipers. "Kurt, the roads are kind of bad. Can we save it for later?"

"Fine," Kurt sighed dramatically, leaning his head against the window.

The longer they drove the harder the rain fell. Somewhere in the distance thunder growled. Blaine drove slowly to the Hummel house, but Kurt wasn't so sure it was entirely due to the weather. Despite his furrowed eyebrows a ghost of a smile remained etched on Blaine's lips; the same smile he wore when he was talking to Julian. Kurt could almost hear the hum of an imaginary projector flicking schoolboy memories across the back of his boyfriend's eyes. The two were sitting mere inches apart but Blaine felt a million miles away.

Kurt cleared his throat and shifted in his seat several times to try to turn Blaine's thoughts back to him. When Blaine didn't look over he turned up the radio and browsed through the stations until he came across one of Blaine's favorite songs. He blasted the volume and sung along with a smile, but Blaine didn't join in. It quickly became clear that whatever attention Blaine could offer to reality was entirely focused on the road. There was no room for Kurt right now.

That's when Kurt decided that whoever this Julian guy was he didn't like him. In fact he despised him. Blaine never ignored Kurt, ever. It wasn't that Kurt minded not being the center of Blaine's attention, but being ignored because Blaine was thinking of another guy, even if he was an old friend, was a problem. Besides, Kurt knew nothing about Julian's relationship with Blaine. What if he was gay? Had he and Blaine experimented in the past? What if he was prettier than Kurt? If Julian was clouding Blaine's thoughts this much after a quick phone call, what would Blaine act like when Julian was physically with him? What if Blaine became so invested in Julian that he forgot about Kurt all together?

A flash of lightning illuminated the sky.

Blaine chuckled lowly and tilted his head toward Kurt, careful not to let his eyes leave the road.

"Isn't it funny," he muttered, more to himself than to his boyfriend.

"Isn't what funny?" Kurt snapped.

The glow from the traffic light hanging above bleached Blaine's face in a harsh red tint. His expression had turned cold, unreadable. Thunder growled from somewhere close ahead and Kurt was briefly reminded of the way Blaine's eye's looked in the final twist in the teleidoscope. Suddenly he wished he hadn't said anything to him at all.

It was only with great effort that he heard Blaine mutter,"The way lightning strikes before you hear it coming?"


	2. Chapter Two

"How was your day sweetheart?"

Blaine chewed his food slowly, a smile twitching at the corner of his lips. "I got a call from an old friend of mine. He flew into Lima today."

"That's wonderful," his mother, Patricia, smiled. She took a long sip of her wine.

"Anyone we know?" his father asked.

"Julian Ira."

Blaine said the name quickly and shoved a large piece of food into his mouth. His parents were bound to find out eventually. He figured telling them now would be better than having them find out for themselves later. Besides, they were pressed for time tonight so the questions wouldn't last long and they'd settle for simple answers. Quick and easy, like peeling off a band-aid.

Patricia's fork fell with a clatter. She stared wide-eyed at her son. His father froze, a piece of steak halfway to his lips. Blaine stared nonchalantly at his plate while he chewed. After what seemed like an eternity his mother cleared her throat and picked up her fork.

"How is Julian now-a-days?"

She didn't meet Blaine's eyes.

Blaine shrugged. "He's studying to be a film student. I guess he graduated early and now he's working on a demo reel for college. A friend of his suggested coming to Lima to shoot it."

When his mom didn't respond his father cleared his throat. "Our company's annual hunting trip is coming up next week, Blaine. Ernie suggested this year we make it a sort of father-son event."

Blaine bit his tongue. His father wasn't asking him if he wanted to go, he was telling him he had to. His hunting trips lasted days, sometimes even over a week.

"Sounds great dad, but I'm not sure I can afford to miss that much school."

"Nonsense," Wade waved his hand dismissively. "You're an honor student who hasn't missed a day of school in your life. One look at your transcripts could prove that. There's no reason they wouldn't allow you to skip a couple days of class."

"I'd be missing out on a lot of work."

"Don't make me laugh. You could make it all up in one night if you wanted to. You're a smart kid."

Blaine sat down his fork. He had strong a feeling his father wouldn't have even brought the hunting trip up if he hadn't mentioned Julian. Suddenly he didn't feel much like eating.

"Your father has a point, sweetie. You're in all AP classes and you just said the other day how easy it was for you. I can call the school Monday and talk everything over with an advisor. They can give you all the work you'd be missing so you can do it in your spare time up north."

If it had only been an invitation before, now it was set in stone.

"May I be excused?" Blaine mumbled.

Wade eyed his son from across the table. "Not until you thank your mother for her offer."

Blaine bit his tongue in an attempt to smile and muttered a quick thank you.

"Oh, dear we better get ready now or we'll be late to the party. Blaine darling, do me a favor and have the dishes washed before we get back?"

"Sure mom."

Blaine gathered the plates as his parents got up from the table. His father gazed at him pointedly before leaving the kitchen, but he pretended not to notice. He knew his parents wouldn't take Julian coming back lightly but he never thought his father would whisk him halfway across the state to keep them away from each other. Blaine's stomach churned. Going up north would mean being apart from Kurt too. Kurt was already up in arms over Julian as it was. How was he going to feel when he explains that now he'll have to leave town for a week because of him?

Suddenly Blaine's phone vibrated in his pocket. He loaded the last of the silverware into the dishwasher and glanced over his shoulder before checking the message.

_On my way._

Shit, between pissing Kurt off and dinner with his parents he completely forgot that Julian was coming over tonight.

_Parents leaving soon, park around corner._

Blaine stuffed his phone back into his pocket - face first so the lit screen wouldn't show through the fabric of his clothes if it went off again- and headed into the living room to wait for any last minute instructions from his parents before they left. The excitement he felt when Julian had called him earlier gradually returned. He began moving around the living room, lighting the fireplace and turning on lamps. Despite how upscale as his parent's house was, it certainly could feel foreboding. His father insisted on using only floor and table lamps as their primary source of lighting, not because he felt it would be some cheaper way to live, but simply because he thought it looked sophisticated. Blaine thought it looked primeval.

His cell phone went off again, this time with a message from Kurt. Blaine decided against telling him about Julian's visit tonight. If Kurt knew Julian was stopping by then he'd want to come over too, which was completely out of the question. It had been two years since Blaine saw Julian and he didn't want to mess it up by having Kurt scare him away with his -although well intended- possessive attitude. And as selfish as it seemed, Blaine wanted to spend their first time together again alone. They had so much to catch up on and reminisce over, Kurt would only feel left out. Besides, Julian was different. Maybe even a little too different for Kurt to warm up to. At least at first. If Kurt wanted to meet Julian then they'd have to take baby steps, for both Kurt's sake and his own.

Blaine glanced towards the hallway and took out his phone again. He was in the middle of replying to Kurt's message when Patricia glided into the room fumbling with her earrings.

"Honey could you help me with these?"

Blaine nearly jumped out of his skin. "Y-Yeah, sure," he stuttered, shoving his phone into his pocket.

Patricia spared him a small smile and gestured toward his pocket. "Better be more careful with that thing. You know how your father gets when he catches you using it."

With a curt nod Blaine moved behind his mother and carefully took the small golden clasp from between her fingers.

"He wouldn't be so testy if he thought I was messaging a girl," he muttered, gliding the clasp into place behind her ear.

"Oh sweetie, you know it's not like that. Here, do the other one too, you know what little patience I have for these things," she passed him a second earring over her shoulder. "Your father is a simple man. He just likes to know your attention is grounded to the family when you're home."

When her second earring was fastened she turned to her son and cupped his cheek in her hand. "Between you and me, I think he's jealous of your friends. You two used to be so close when you were younger, now you barely speak to each other. I swear it's like you're complete strangers."

Blaine's lips molded into a small smile against his will. As much as they wished it were true they both knew his father's resentment wasn't fueled from Blaine's social life.

"Go finish getting ready, mom. You're late enough as it is."

Patricia patted her son's cheek and turned to go upstairs. Blaine watched her walk away; her curly black hair bouncing lightly off her shoulders. The resemblance between the two was striking. Blaine's skin tone, his hazel eyes, soft nose, short stature, and unruly hair had all been given to him by her, as had his musical talent. When he was younger he could have sworn he shared her bright smile too, but now he couldn't be sure. It had been a long time since she truly smiled.

"Mom," Blaine called to her when she reached the staircase.

Patricia turned back to look at her son.

"Yeah, sweetie?"

"You look beautiful."

The comment caught her off guard. For a brief moment she was reminded of Blaine when he was a little boy. Every time she got ready for a party Blaine would turn it into a huge deal. His fascination for the dresses and jewelry she would wear was endless. He stuck around just long enough to pick out what accessories to wear with each dress then ran off before he had a chance to see how she looked and hid his face under the pillows on the couch. He refused to look at her until she was about to leave because he said he wanted it to be a surprise, even if he'd seen her in the same dress a million times before. And when he did see her his eyes would grow as big as saucers and he'd give her the largest smile before jumping up and down excitedly on the couch, shouting that she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen in his life. Patricia would laugh and tell him no, the glitter of the dress and jewelry is what made her beautiful, but he insisted that it was the other way around. Because he had the prettiest mother in the entire world and any dress she wore would make her look beautiful because she was an angel and angels have a soft glow that puts everything into a better light.

But like most boys as he grew older his interests turned to things other than her dresses. Sometimes he would tell her to change her necklace or suggest a certain pair of shoes to wear, but that was it. There was no more hiding until she was ready to go. There was no more excitement. For a while he swung by her bedroom to tell her how good she looked before she had all her make up on so she wouldn't interrupt him while he was playing video games. Nowadays he barely spared her a glance before she left for the night, pausing only to shout a quick goodbye over his homework.

Patricia's eyes welled and she tilted her head to the side, tightening her lips into a heartfelt smile. Blaine grinned at her from across the room. His eyes showed no more excitement than they did during dinner and he stood perfectly calm, but his smile held just as much admiration for her as it did when he was little.

"Thank you baby," she sighed, careful not to sound too teary, and made her way up the staircase.

* * *

><p>"What's gotten into you now?" Wade gruffed.<p>

Patricia stood over their bed and eased the contents from her purse into an expensive clutch. "Blaine told me I looked beautiful," she smiled.

Wade slipped on his blazer, musing over the idea before turning to her seriously. "What does he want?"

Patricia laughed, "Maybe he just wants to make his mother feel good."

"I think he wants to take your mind off what he said earlier, or have you forgotten?"

Her face fell.

"How could I?"

Wade adjusted his blazer at the hems with a quick flick of his wrist and crossed the room to the mirror.

"I thought we were free of this problem when he transferred."

"He did say Julian was just visiting, darling. Maybe things will be different this time."

"Julian," Wade snorted with disgust. "You better keep an eye on your son, Patricia. If I catch wind of him acting up or sneaking out in the middle of the night to do god knows what I'll personally see to it that he never leaves this house again."

He grappled with his tie, frustration settling in. With a small smile Patricia turned him from the mirror and silently offered to do it herself. Her husband grunted a small thank you and let his hands drop to his sides as she worked.

"Everything will be alright darling, you'll see. Julian will be gone before you know it. Blaine said he was only here to work on some project in Lima, didn't he? That, and with you taking him on your hunting trip there's a chance he won't show up at all." Wade rolled his eyes but his wife held a stern finger to his lips before he could speak. "Remember what you promised me? If he ever showed up again we'd let Blaine handle him on his own. It's up to him if he wants Julian around or not. Blaine's changed so much since Cottingham sweetie; he's grown away from his old friends, it's possible he's grown away from Julian as well."

She finished fixing his tie and grabbed her clutch from the bed. Wade bit his cheek in an effort not to put too much stock into his wife's words.

"We'll see about that."

* * *

><p>Blaine paced the living room, phone in hand. Kurt had suddenly become persistent on coming over tonight to apologize for snapping at him earlier but Blaine wouldn't have it. He insisted that he had way too much homework to catch up on and that they'd talk tomorrow. By the way Kurt's texts were coming in faster and with shorter messages Blaine knew that he was becoming angry all over again, but he was finding it hard to care at the moment. His parents would be leaving any minute now and Julian was probably already waiting around the corner for the all clear.<p>

_I'm sorry, Kurt. I'll come over tomorrow okay?_

Blaine heard his parent's footsteps coming down the stairs. Phone still in hand, he crossed the room swiftly and pressed his back against a bookshelf next to the archway so his father wouldn't see him.

"Blaine, honey," his mother called. "Could you-"

His phone vibrated in his hand with a reply from Kurt. Blaine tuned out his mother and read it quickly.

_Fine._

The closet door opened behind him. He knew if he left their conversation at that Kurt would refuse to let him go to his house tomorrow. With Julian coming over Blaine wasn't sure if he'd get a chance to talk to Kurt again tonight before his parents came home. He typed out a quick 'I love you' and shoved his phone into his pocket at the same time, praying the auto-correct would be in his favor and their discussion would be over for now.

"Did you hear your mother Blaine?" Wade called sternly from the hallway when his son didn't respond.

Thinking quickly, Blaine met them by the door. He took his mother's fur coat from the rack and held it open for her. "Sorry mom I was in the bathroom. What do you need?"

Wade shrugged on his own coat and fiddled with the sleeves. His glared at his son suspiciously.

"Oh thank you dear. We're going to be out late tonight so you'll need to iron your blazer yourself. I won't have time to do it in the morning."  
>"That's fine mom, I'll do it." Blaine kissed his mother on the cheek and opened the front door for her.<p>

Patricia plastered a rosy kiss on her son's cheek and went out to the car. Wade hung back just long enough to allow her to get out of earshot before turning to his son.

"Bathroom huh," he said, looming over Blaine, "Funny, I don't recall hearing the toilet flush."

Blaine stared at his dad steadily.

"I was fixing my hair."

Father and son locked eyes in an intense silence, Wade daring his son to blink. When Blaine didn't give in he nodded brusquely and continued out the door.

"No friends," he said sharply.

Blaine watched his parents pull away and shut the door. Almost immediately there was a knock on the other side. Suddenly he felt like he might get sick. Between shopping all day, having Kurt upset with him, and putting up with his father, he didn't know how he was going to pull this off. Nonetheless, he painted a grin -only half forced- onto his face and turned the handle.

His hands instantly shot to his face. He was met not with a smiling face, but with a blast of harsh light from a video camera.

"My how you've grown," a smooth voice said from somewhere beyond the light.  
>Blaine fumbled back into the house, trying his best to blink away the red spots from his vision.<p>

"Be careful with that thing, Julian."

"I forgot how sensitive your eyes can be," the other boy chucked, "I'm used to your house being dim so I wanted to make sure I had enough light to capture your reaction properly. But apparently someone finally figured out how to screw in a light bulb."Julian shut the camera off and let himself inside. "I would say I like what they've done with the place but it doesn't look like anything's changed much. Except for you, of course."

Blaine pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut in a final attempt to focus them. When they opened again Julian was standing mere inches from his face.

"I'm waiting," he purred.

The boys stood nose to nose, neither one daring to speak. As he breathed in Julian's scent a thrill shot down Blaine's spine and his insides turned upside down. His knees quivered in a strange way and his mind went blank. He excused it as an involuntary reaction. After all, some of his fondest memories were filled with this scent. It was like breathing in a different time, a different place, one that he had almost forgotten and yet wasn't his to forget. Julian was here, against all odds, and nothing else mattered anymore.

Not being able to stand it much longer, Blaine gave in to his excitement and threw his arms around him, squeezing tightly.

"I can't believe you're here," he grinned. "I've missed you so much."

Julian broke the embrace and shoved his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, examining Blaine coolly. Blaine took him in at the same time. His black hair -although mostly hidden by the hood of his jacket- stuck out stylishly, and his dark eyes were just as piercing as he remembered. Even with the rugged five o clock shadow, Julian was as beautiful as ever.

Blaine's stomach turned when he realized that Julian was staring intently into his eyes. He tried not to blush. Julian's gaze always made him feel like a child trying to sneak something past his parents.

Blaine cleared his throat awkwardly, "You look great."

Julian snorted and began wandering around the house.

"I wish I could say the same about you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Blaine laughed, close at his heels.

"Well your hair needs a good washing for starters," Julian played absentmindedly with the light switch in the kitchen. "There's no excuse for that much gel."

Blaine ran his hand over his head self-consciously. "Oh come on, you know how much product it takes to tame it. Besides, I need it to look nice for-"

"Secondly, you've lost too much weight. Not that you had much to begin with." Julian crinkled his nose in disapproval as he ran his eyes over Blaine once again.

"I haven't lost it, I'm just toned. It kind of comes with the Warbler package. We don't sit still much."

Blaine followed his friend as he moved to the living room and examined the pictures on the fireplace with little interest.

"It would also do you wise to wipe that lipstick off your cheek. Who are you trying to fool?"

With a soft smile Blaine shook his head and scrubbed at his face gently. Nothing got past Julian. He watched his old friend move leisurely around the living room with his hands in his pockets. The bored expression on his face made it seem as if he wasn't taking in anything at all, but Blaine knew better. Julian was looking for something.

He stopped at a picture of Patricia and let out a slow whistle.

"Mommy's looking hot as ever. Perkier too. Were the implants Wade's idea or was it some meager attempt on her part to look more like those secretaries of his so he'd want to fuck her sometimes too?"

Blaine shrugged and looked at the floor, making Julian snort.

"Figures," he breathed. "Now we know where you get your low self-esteem from. Anyway, from the way you keep shifting your body toward the staircase I assume your bedroom's still upstairs."

Blaine felt the blood rise to his ears. Julian didn't miss a beat. In two quick strides he was at Blaine's face again, searching for some sort of sign.

"I knew it," he breathed, as if he had been saving some judgment until this precise moment.

That nervous feeling stirred in Blaine's stomach again.

"Knew what?"

"You're not leaning toward the stairs because you're anxious, you're doing it out of habit. How many guys have you had standing in your living room, just like I am now, examining your house and asking questions they don't care to hear the answer to, just waiting for you to motion towards your room like you've been doing, _so they could fuck you?_"

Blaine's jaw lazed just enough in surprise to part his lips slightly.

"Come on Blaine, you can tell me," Julian whispered darkly. He clamped his fingers tightly over Blaine's chin and turning his face slowly from side to side. "We're best friends, aren't we? Best friends don't keep secrets from each other."

Blaine swallowed hard. He had no reason to be this nervous. Julian was right, he was his friend; the closest friend he ever had. So why did he have the feeling that Julian was one wrong answer away from attacking him?

"One," he said hoarsely, "Only one."

Julian held Blaine's face still and scanned his features carefully. Blaine stared steadily into his eyes, trying to figure out what exactly he was up to. He felt his body stiffen in the thick silence that fell over them. Julian cocked his head to the side and squinted as if he were trying to figure out a riddle. When he concluded that Blaine wasn't lying he removed his hand and continued his one sided tour of the house. Blaine exhaled deeply through his nose and eyed him with caution. Julian seemed upset, and Blaine knew only too well what happened when he got upset.

"I would have been ecstatic if you had said ten. Proud if you said seven," Julian opened doors and spared each room an uninterested glace before slamming them closed again. Blaine stood idly by the staircase, safely out of arms reach.

"Happy if it were five. Content with three," he crossed the room to the staircase, stopping only to breathe into Blaine's ear. "But one? That concerns me."

Reluctant, Blaine followed him up the staircase and into his bedroom. He cleared his throat anxiously.

"Shouldn't it be the other way around?"

Julian paced Blaine's room for a few minutes in silence. He glanced over his bookshelf, shifted through his closet -snorting harshly when he saw his Dalton blazer, and rummaged through his nightstand drawer. His investigation finally ceased when he came to Blaine's dresser.

"Ah, here we are," he whispered, eyes blazing, as he picked up a picture of Kurt. "You see Blaine; I don't care if you're a whore. After running off to that all boys school I didn't expect anything less of you. But love? That surprises me."

Julian streaked his thumb over Kurt's face as he spoke. He studied his face thoroughly.

"I sensed something was off from the moment I saw you. But it wasn't your hair, or your weight, it was him."

"His name is Kurt."

"Kurt."

Julian raised his eyebrows and echoed the name, letting it swish around in his mouth before allowing it to settle on his tongue. Blaine's palms began to sweat. He didn't like the way Julian said Kurt's name.

"And how did we meet Kurt?"

Blaine sat on the edge of his bed. Julian kept his eyes glued to the picture, and for a brief moment Blaine wondered if he had blinked since he spotted it.

"We met at Dalton. He was a transfer student."

At that he tossed the picture down and sat next to Blaine, making Blaine flinch. Julian's weight on his bed didn't feel right compared to Kurt's.

"So he wasn't the reason you left?"

Blaine ran a hand through his hair and glanced at the picture on his dresser.

"No, he was the reason I stayed."

A dark shadow grew over Julian's features. With one swift movement he pushed Blaine onto his back and swung his leg over his pelvis, straddling the Warbler at the hip. Blaine gasped in surprise and made to push him off, but Julian was faster. He grabbed his wrists and pinned them tightly to his sides.

"Remind me again Blaine Anderson," he loomed over Blaine dominantly, their faces a breath away from touching. "Why you left."

A strong waft of burning leaves and musk filled Blaine's nostrils. Even with Julian on the verge of exploding right now he couldn't stop the trickle of excitement from pouring down his spine when he breathed him in. Because with the scent came the memories, and with the memories came the hurricane of emotions that defined their relationship. It was like some sort of sick aphrodisiac for his soul.

Blaine prayed Julian wouldn't notice the bark of goose bumps that coated his skin and said as firmly as he could muster, "You know why I left."

Julian's eyes studied his with a dying intensity and Blaine knew that he wouldn't push the subject any further. No matter how badly Julian wanted to discuss it, they both knew tonight was not the night.

He released Blaine's arms and sat up.

"I suppose so," he cooed, brushing a few strands of hair from Blaine's eyes.

"Tell me about Kurt."

"Why don't we talk about you for a change?" Blaine muttered.

"Don't tell me you feel guilty talking about your little play toy while another man's on top of you."

Julian rolled his hips slowly against Blaine's. Blaine flushed violently.

"Despite what you seem to believe he's not just some fuck buddy of mine."

Julian continued to grind against him with both a small smile and a sneer. Blaine's breath hitched. Between his aroma and the sensation he thought he might explode. Not even in a sexual way, not really. Sure, Julian knew how to push his buttons, but if there was any chance of Blaine getting hard right now it wouldn't be born just from lust, but from the thrill of having Julian so close to him again. A couple hours ago the mere mention of the name 'Julian' wouldn't have made him bat an eye. It had been years since the thought of him even crossed his mind. But good lord now here he was, like a crack of lightning across a starry sky, from nothing to a thousand miles per hour, somehow a few degrees more than tangible.

Julian. _His Julian._His best friend. His whole past and at one point his entire future all rolled into one. Who wouldn't feel like exploding?

"You should stop," his voice rasped.

Julian cocked his head to the side and pressed harder against his groin. "This is who we are, Blaine. This is what we do," his eyes flashed. "Don't tell me you've forgotten?"

How could he? This was how they talked. Some guys texted each other, others would drink. Most would chit-chat over video games in the basement, but not them. Just as his aroma acted as a stimulant, Julian's rhythmic movements set Blaine at ease. Whenever Blaine was stressed Julian would lay him back and grind on him and they'd just talk. Blaine would be lying if he said it was nothing sexual, because that's what grinding was after all, but above anything it was soothing. Julian used it as a way to get Blaine to open up. They would lay like that for hours on end, Julian rocking his hips into Blaine's and Blaine playing with the strings on Julian's hoodie while they talked about anything and everything. Julian on the other hand used it in a slightly different way. When he had something to say he wanted to make sure Blaine heard it, and what better way was there to keep him hanging on his every word than to grind on him? He could emphasize the importance of his words physically; thrusting harder when he wanted to make sure Blaine was paying attention and slowing down to show him when he was listening. In some strange sense it was beautiful, like having someone feel the weight of your words instead of only hearing them.

"Do you remember the first time Wade caught us doing this?"

Julian leaned forward and cupped the sides of Blaine's neck. He slid his thumbs behind his earlobes and rubbed them in small circles. Blaine closed his eyes and bit back a moan. Julian knew all of his sensitive spots, even the ones he hadn't told Kurt about.

"We were in the backyard on the trampoline. You were upset. I kept nagging you to tell me what was wrong but you wouldn't. So I pinned you down, crawled on top of you, and-"

Julian thrust his hips up hard. The sensation of the tickling behind his ears and the pressure on his cock was enough to make Blaine hard. Extremely hard. His breathing grew louder and he couldn't stifle his moans any longer. Fuck, this was bad. With the holidays just around the corner and all of the extracurricular activates the two had thrown themselves into; there had been no opportunities for him and Kurt to make love. Toss in all the stress from school and perfecting routines with the Warblers and seeing Kurt in those fucking tight pants all the time and you had the perfect combination for Blaine to become a walking landmine -ready to explode at the lightest touch.

Julian chuckled.

"I remember how you freaked out and started screaming. I had to shove my fingers in your mouth to shut you up. And I told you the same thing I'm going to tell you now. **Relax!**"

Julian spat the word so furiously that Blaine's heart skipped a beat. His eyes shot open and he flinched, waiting for Julian to strike him like he so often would when he became angry. But no blow came. Instead Julian smiled and continued to rub behind his ears.

"And you did, and you liked it, and you poured your bleeding little heart out to me on that trampoline. Enter the old man. He flipped his shit, remember? Said what we were doing was wrong. Tried to beat it out of you before you got in too deep. Guess that didn't really work out in his favor. But it didn't feel wrong back then, did it Blaine? Does it feel wrong now?"

Blaine bit his lip. Yes, it did feel wrong. Julian knew exactly what he was doing to him. He wasn't trying to get Blaine to open up like before; he was testing his devotion to Kurt. But god it felt so right to have Julian back with him again like this. It was familiar and tantalizing and relieving and Jesus how could he have walked through the front door for all these years and never quite have that feeling of being more at home than he did right now?

Julian leaned across the bed and grabbed his video camera. He continued to rock his hips effortlessly as he fumbled with it for a moment before turning it on Blaine, who gazed up at him through a haze of lust and confusion. A little red circle began to blink from the side of the lens.

"Tell me Blaine, what more could Kurt possibly mean to you?"

Blaine allowed himself to wallow in Julian's thrusts for a moment before composing himself. He propped himself up on his elbows and looking straight into the camera.

"Everything."

Julian stopped rolling his hips. The smirk on his face dropped but he didn't lower his camera.

"I was right," he whispered. "You do love him."

"More than anything," Blaine managed to smile.

"Define anything."

"Well, let's see," Blaine clasped his hands behind his head and fell on his back again, staring at the ceiling. "More than playing the piano and singing, more than music altogether, I suppose. More than making people smile and performing. Sports, coffee, fashion, and all that stupid stuff that I can't help but love. Summer," Blaine smiled. "Definitely more than summer; and you know how much I love it. Movies and reading. I love him more than all of it I guess. Everything that ever existed and ever will exist, you know? There's nothing out there that I can't imagine myself living without more than him."

Julian lowered his camera just enough to get a good look at Blaine's face. "Do you love him more than me?"

Blaine furrowed his eyebrows together. "Friendship is a different kind of love, you know?"

"Cut the bullshit and give it to me straight. Do you love him more than me?"

Blaine sat up and lowered the camera from Julian's face.

"Let's just say that you're a close second, okay?"

Julian snapped his camera closed and sprung from the bed, Blaine close behind him, ready for a fight. Screw it. If Julian didn't like his answer then Blaine would be more than happy to show him the way out. Yes, he wanted him to be okay with it; in fact he yearned for it with every fiber in his being. He wanted Julian to be glad that he found someone like Kurt. He wanted him to be happy that he was finally content with the way his life was going. Hell he wanted him to be happy with his transfer to Dalton and look where that got them. Blaine should have known better than to think that Julian would settle for second best.

But, to his surprise, that's exactly what he did.

"I'm happy for you Blaine," he smiled.

"But?" Blaine snapped. There was no way Julian would leave it at that. It was too simple.

"I'm concerned. You've let some boy become the center of your universe."

"And?"

"How can you be certain that you're the center of his?"

Blaine's body tensed. His mind went blank. And in that fleeting moment of uncertainly he felt truly terrified.

"That's what I thought. One more question before I leave. When was the last time you cried?"

Blaine swallowed hard, "When I was twelve."

A sly smile split across Julian's face. He shot Blaine a wink and patted him on the shoulder on his way out the door.

"Until next time, Anderson."

* * *

><p>The blare from Kurt's phone seemed loud enough to wake the whole street. Kurt woke with a start and hastily punched the volume button, squinting through the light of the screen to see Blaine's picture smiling up at him. He answered with a grunt.<p>

"What," he snapped.

A voice he didn't recognize answered.

"Kurt it's Patricia, Blaine's mother."

If he was only half asleep before, now he was wide awake. He'd never spoken to either of Blaine's parents before. It was by mere chance that he saw them when he went to Dalton, but back then he barely considered Blaine to be his friend, so there was no cause for introductions. Since then he had only see them in passing, meaning whenever he would wait for them to leave their house so he could go in undetected. He wasn't even sure if Blaine had told them about their relationship. Why on earth would she be calling him now? Unless-

"Darling are you there?"

Kurt read the clock on his nightstand. It was three in the morning. His heart jolted.

"Yes," he shouted, "I'm here! What happened to Blaine? Was he in an accident? Is everything okay?"

"Blaine is… fine, sweetie. Listen, I'm sorry to call you so late but I didn't know when else I'd be able to get a hold of you."

She spoke with a quiet urgency, like she was afraid of getting caught. Kurt shook his head, confused. What on earth was going on?

"It's fine Mrs. Anderson, really."

"Darling I need you to listen very carefully, it's important."

Kurt sat up; suddenly more scared now than he had been a few seconds ago.

"H-How can I help you Mrs. Anderson?"

"We need to talk about Julian."

* * *

><p>End Notes: Reviews are greatly appreciated!<p> 


	3. Chapter Three

**AN:** Thank you all for the lovely reviews! I know this chapter took a while to get out but we're understaffed at work so I've been putting in a lot of hours this week. Anyway, hope this makes up for it!

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><p>"Rough night?" Burt asked as Kurt entered the kitchen.<p>

"Why do you ask?"

"You look sick."

Kurt shrugged and refilled his glass with water. "I feel fine."

"Wanna explain to me why you've been throwing up in the bathroom all morning then?"

Finn stopped chewing his food abruptly. His eyes bulged and the color drained from his face. "Quinn used to throw up in the morning," he barked, bits of scrambled eggs spitting from his mouth.

"Dad I'm fine, really," Kurt held onto his glass with both hands to keep it from shaking. There was a sharp pounding in his head and the layer of sweat on his skin made him feel like he standing in a sauna. He wasn't lying to Burt when he said he wasn't sick; to say that you were implied a bit of rest would make you better. But Kurt couldn't rest. The conversation with Blaine's mom last night buzzed around so viciously in his head that his body couldn't keep itself still. When he wasn't pacing he was shaking, and when he tried to keep from shaking he vomited. Was he sick? No. It felt more like suffocating.

Finn frantically pulled out his wallet and spilled what few coins he had onto the table in front of him. "Look, I know guys can't get pregnant, but maybe you caught morning sickness from someone. I'll run up to the store and get a handful of tests and make all the girls take them and-"

"Enough, Finn," Burt glared at Kurt over his breakfast. "You hung over or something?"

Kurt considered his question. If he agreed then the worst his dad could do was lecture him about the dangers of underage drinking and ground him. On the other hand he might feel better if he told him the truth. His dad always knew exactly what to say to put his mind at ease. But how would he tell him?

_No dad, I'm not hung over, but I got a call from my boyfriend's mom last night warning me about a psychopath in Lima._ _No, no don't worry, I'll be careful. Here's a fun idea, why don't you give me a curfew to put your mind at ease? Yeah, I'll just lay low until he disappears. By the way, did I mention his relationship to Blaine? No? Oh just wait until you hear, it's an earful! _

Right, like that would blow over well.

"Carol heard you talking to someone on the phone late last night. Said you sounded upset. You know you can tell me what's going on, Bud, I won't get angry at you."

Kurt's hands jerked against his will, flinging water over the table. Finn stopped counting his change and lifted his eyebrows at his step-brother. "Woah, calm down dude, it'll be okay; morning sickness doesn't last long. But hey, do you know how many pregnancy tests come in a box? I think I might be a couple dollars short-"

Kurt slammed his cup onto the table.

"I don't have morning sickness Finn! _God you can be so stupid sometimes!_ Fine, so Blaine and I had a few drinks last night. He called and we got into an argument and now I'm paying the price for drinking and it won't happen again, okay?"

"Hey, hey, hey! I know you aren't feeling right but that's no excuse to lash out on Finn like that. Now I want you to apologize to your brother, clean up your mess, and get some sleep. We'll talk more about this tomorrow when I get home."

Kurt had never been so grateful for his dad's second job at GM than he was now. Feeling only slightly relieved, he did as he was told and spent most of his Sunday alone in his room. His conversation with Patricia the night before loomed over him like a shadow. If what she said about Julian was true then Kurt was going to have to prepare himself for the rough road that lay ahead of him. He just didn't know how.

Unpredictable, manipulative, and dangerous were the words she had used to describe him. Patricia made it very clear that she only met him a handful of times, and when she did nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

But she heard stories.

She talked to Blaine's principle at Cottingham and, when things got really bad, even heard Blaine recounting incidents with Julian in his sleep; muttering stories that made Kurt's stomach turn. It sent him into frenzy. How do you prepare yourself for someone like that?

And knowing that he and Blaine were so close….

Kurt spent the greater portion of his Sunday heaving into the toilet.

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><p>Amidst a sea of pleading text messages he reluctantly allowed Blaine to come over that night. Blaine arrived as chipper as ever, but he looked just as exhausted as Kurt felt. Uncertain of how he would react if Blaine mentioned Julian, Kurt persuaded him to help him with his homework; praying against all odds that it would be enough to keep both their minds at bay.<p>

The two lay propped against Kurt's headboard. Blaine held the book steadily in front of them, his arm wrapped around Kurt's torso so he could snuggle close. Kurt read along as Blaine recited the words aloud. Apart from using it as a distraction from Julian, Kurt was grateful that his boyfriend agreed to read to him. The poem he was assigned resembled a monotone drawl when he read it to himself, making it impossible for Kurt to follow, but Blaine was a fascinating narrator; pausing appropriately and pitching his voice in a way that breathed color into the words that Kurt alone had found so bleak.

"From childhood's hour I have not been  
>As others were; I have not seen<br>As others saw; I could not bring  
>My passions from a common spring.<p>

From the same source I have not taken  
>My sorrow; I could not awaken<br>My heart to joy at the same tone…  
>And all I loved, I loved alone."<p>

Blaine's voice hitched slightly on the last line. Kurt nuzzled his head deeper into Blaine's collarbone, wondering briefly why the words had caught him off-guard.

"Then- in my childhood, in the dawn  
>Of a most stormy life- was drawn<br>From every depth of good and ill…  
>The mystery… which… binds me still… "<p>

Blaine stopped reading. His eyes stayed on the page but his gaze was far away.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked.

"Nothing," Blaine cleared his throat and sat up a little straighter. "The print in this is ridiculously small, everything just blurred together for a second, I... Where was I again?"

Kurt jabbed his finger at the passage where Blaine trailed off. "You know, most of the novels on your bookshelf make this one look like it was printed by Scholastic. You shouldn't have any trouble reading it."

"Right," Blaine breathed, "You're right. Sorry Kurt, I didn't get much sleep last night."

Gripped with the sudden impulse to whip the book across the room, Kurt bit his cheek to stop himself from screaming that Blaine couldn't have had less sleep than he had. He wanted to confront him about Julian once and for all, but he couldn't. Patricia had made him promise not to tell Blaine about their conversation.

Blaine cleared his throat again and continued reading.

"From the torrent, or the fountain,  
>From the red cliff of the mountain,<br>From the sun that round me rolled  
>In its autumn tint of gold,<br>From the lightning in the sky  
>As it passed me flying by,<br>From the thunder and the storm,  
>And the cloud that took the form<br>(When the rest of Heaven was blue)  
>Of a… Of a demon in my view."<p>

Blaine hesitated before closing the book and setting it down beside him.

"Did that help at all?"

"Poe's childhood sucked just like everyone else's so he cried about it in a poem. Great. Now all I have to do is break it down and write a three page essay on why he was such a dismal prick." Kurt huffed.

Blaine frowned. "Grim as he may have been, I wouldn't call him a prick. His father left and his mom died when he was two. Shouldn't you be empathizing with him?"

Kurt sat upright, furious. "Why? Because his mother passed away? News flash Blaine, parents die every day. In retrospect _everyone_ should be able to relate to him. You think just because both of our moms died when we were young that makes us similar? Well guess what? It doesn't. Because when I look at clouds I don't see demons, _I just see the stupid clouds!"_

Blaine looked stricken. "Kurt, what's this about? Ever since I got here you've been nothing but cold towards me. Did I do something wrong?"

"Not yet, but it's only a matter of time." Kurt snapped.

Blaine stiffened. "What's that supposed to mean?"

There was no turning back now. The shielded expression on Blaine face confirmed they were both on the same page.

Kurt spoke diligently, careful not to let on he knew more than he should. "It means that I don't know who this Julian guy is. It's obvious from your conversation yesterday that you have a… _history_ together. How should I know what sort of influence he's going to have on you when he gets here?"

Blaine closed his eyes and rubbed his fingers in slow circles over his temple. "I've known him since we were twelve; _of course_ we have a history together."

"Mmm. Mind elaborating for me?"

"What is there to elaborate about, Kurt? Julian is a great guy. We grew up together; he was like a brother to me. Julian was the only friend I had before I went to Dalton... I mean, what exactly do you want me to say here? We went to the same school and-" Blaine's eyes shot open. "Wait a minute. You don't think I'm going to cheat on you with him, do you?"

Kurt gawked back in response. No, cheating was the last thing on his mind. But now that Blaine brought it up it made him wonder…

"Is that what this is about? Look, Kurt. I know how intimidating it must be to have someone like Julian pop up out of nowhere like this-"

"You have no idea." Kurt muttered.

"_But_," Blaine leaned across the bed and squeezed his hand. "You have to trust me when I say that no matter how close we used to be, there has _never_ been any chemistry between us. Not like that. And there never will be. Julian is great, and all the makings are there, but the thought never crossed either of our minds. We really are just _really good friends_. If anything, I'm the one who should be worried about you running off with him."

Kurt bit his lower lip and lowered his eyes, desperate not to lose his composure. How could Blaine's perception on Julian be so warped? None of this made any sense.

"But I'm not," Blaine smiled. "You wanna know why? Because I believe in you, and I believe in us, and no matter what anyone ever says or does, we'll always have each other."

The tears that Kurt had been fighting back all day burned at his eyes. "I'm just so scared, Blaine," his voice quivered. "I don't want to lose you."

Blaine pulled him back onto the bed and leaned over him, rubbing his hand over his cheek. Kurt squeezed his eyes closed and let his tears spill freely.

_"I'm not ready to lose you,"_ he choked.

"Oh, god Kurt don't," Blaine whispered, planting soft kisses on his forehead. "You aren't going to lose me. Hey, open your eyes. Look at me."

A heavy sob escaped Kurt's throat when he gazed unwillingly at his boyfriend.

"This changes _nothing_ between us, you know that right? You're still you, and I'm still me, and no one can ever take away our feelings for each other… _My feelings for you._ I care about you more than anyone else. Hey," Blaine shook Kurt's shoulders to hold his attention. "Even myself, Kurt. _Even myself_."

At that Kurt broke completely. He threw his arms around Blaine's neck and held him close, fierce sobs wrecking his body. Blaine kissed every inch of his neck that he could reach, mumbling soothing words between each peck. Kurt had never shown this much concern for any of Blaine's friends at Dalton. Even the few who had been candid with their intentions to become more than friends never earned more than a pitied eye-roll from Kurt; so why would Julian be any different? If anything Blaine expected him to be understanding. Yet here he was, destroying himself with jealousy before he even met Julian, surrendering to a war that had never been proclaimed.

Kurt shook his head and grabbed Blaine's face, pulling it to his.

"I'll fight for you," he pined. "I won't let him take you. I'll fight for you, I'll fight for you, I'll fight-"

Blaine moaned and lunged forward. He pushed his tongue between Kurt's lips; desperate to swallow those words and hold them inside so Kurt could never take them back. No one had ever said that to him before. _Ever._ Not his parents, not his friends, not even Julian. It meant more to Blaine than he could stand. And hearing them here, right now, with Kurt devastated over the mere thought of losing him, was more than he could bear.

"You know I love you, right?" Blaine rasped, but it only made Kurt only cry harder.

"Listen to me. Kurt, listen. I love you _so much_. Julian means _nothing _to me compared to you. Love is all about trust, baby... And by god if you've never trusted me before then I need you to trust me on this one. _Nothing is going to happen between us. _Do you understand?"

It was obvious from Kurt's sobs that he didn't. Blaine knew deep down that Kurt knew he loved him, but he had to hear him say it. He needed him to acknowledge Blaine's feelings for him. He needed to know Kurt trusted him...

Out of nowhere Julian's voice crept inside Blaine's head.

_You've let some boy become the center of your universe... How can you be certain that you're the center of his?_

The hair on the back if his neck shot up. Blaine tightened his embrace. His breathing hampered and quite suddenly Blaine felt his words of reassurance weren't meant entirely for Kurt anymore.

"You don't have to fight for me baby," he breathed. "I swear I… I'll never let anything go that far."

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><p>Blaine left that night with the off thought that if Julian was the thunder in a forthcoming hurricane, Kurt would be his lighthouse, beckoning him home at sea.<p>

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><p>Kurt was so wound up in his thoughts of Julian that it seemed as if he arrived at school the next day completely by accident. His attempts of being distracted by his classes and his friends all proved meaningless; he had bigger things to worry about.<p>

Or so he thought, until he saw a scrap piece of notebook paper stuffed inside the crack of his locker.

Curious, Kurt unfolded it. It only had two small lines of writing; an address and a signature.

_3418 Timberidge _

_-Dave_

Kurt spun around and sprinted down the hall, paper in hand. Passing time was nearly over but there was still a small chance that Dave would still be hanging around. By a stroke of luck Kurt spotted him at his locker.

"What's this?" he demanded, shoving the paper in Dave's face.

Karofsky closed his locker and glanced around the hallway.

"It's an invite to a party," he muttered.

Kurt squinted at him, silently pressing for further explanation.

"Look, it wasn't my idea, okay? My dad found out I was throwing a party and pressured me into inviting you so we can make amends or whatever. He's been on my case about you ever since you came back last year and it's really starting to piss me off. I keep telling him everything's cool between us now but he doesn't believe me."

Kurt continued to stare at Dave, not quite sure what to make of what he was saying. He and Karofsky were on better terms this year. Kurt wouldn't go so far as to say that they were on good terms, but they weren't on bad ones. He didn't like that Dave was still too scared to admit he was gay to everyone, but he respected that he needed time to work up the courage to come out. Dave appreciated Kurt for understanding. Their friendship was nothing more than a silent comprehension. The two had barely spoken three words to each other all year, which was why the party invitation threw Kurt off guard.

"Look, you don't have to come if you don't want to. I kind of hope you don't. Most of the football team will be there and… you know," Dave trailed off. He didn't need to finish his sentence for Kurt to get the message.

"I understand. If I showed up they'd probably question why you invited the gay kid, initiating an entire realm of rumors regarding your sexuality to explode all over campus, which, forgive me, wouldn't exactly be false."

Karofsky's eyes bulged and he made a hushing noise at Kurt, motioning that there were still other students in the hallway.

"Look Dave, I know how much your reputation means to you so I'm going to agree not to go… at least not for long. How about I swing by for a few minutes to give your dad some peace of mind? I'll get there early before everyone shows so there's minimal risk of your thick-headed friends spotting me."

"You'd do that for me?" Dave asked lowly, taking another sweep of the hallway.

Kurt hesitated for only a second before he nodded. "You owe me one."

Dave jumped when the bell rang, sparing Kurt one last glance before heading off to class. The thought of being even more indebted to the boy than he already felt he was made him uncomfortable. Maybe inviting him was a bad idea after all. Whatever, at least his dad would stop pestering him about making amends all the time.

Kurt strutted back to his locker, invite in hand. He hated the idea of going to Karofsky's party just as much as Dave did, but he figured it couldn't hurt. In fact it might just be the act of kindness Karofsky needed right now.

He was so distracted by his thoughts of Dave and the party that he walked straight into someone as he rounded the empty hallway.

"Excuse me I-" he began, but cut himself off when he realized it wasn't a teacher or a straggling student he ran into.

"Hey," the boy held out his hand with a smile. Kurt made to take it out of reflex, but something held him back.

"My, aren't you a timid one?" he chuckled, "I never would have pegged you as Blaine's type."

Kurt's breath hitched in his chest. This must be him.

"The name's Julian, but judging by your lack of curiosity I'm guessing you already knew that. Can't imagine who spoiled the surprise… but no matter. It makes all of this a little less awkward, don't you think?" Julian wiped the hood of his jacket from his head with a boyish laugh. Kurt wished he would keep it on. He was more beautiful than he could stand.

"It's funny… Blaine told me your name and showed me your picture but refused to tell me anything about you. I thought it was kind of strange since you're his boyfriend and all." Julian chuckled when Kurt cocked an eyebrow. "What I mean to say is; Blaine always goes on and on and on about the stuff he's passionate about. Seriously, you can't shut the kid up half the time. But he didn't say much about you. In fact he didn't say anything at all. I kept my mouth shut because I figured you must be boring or something, but I decided to come and find out for myself."

Kurt eyed Julian carefully as he spoke. This didn't make any sense. In his head he painted Julian to be some dark mannered, soft spoken lunatic, but here he was; rocking excitedly on the balls of his feet and laughing innocently over his words. Nothing about his personality screamed danger at all. He seemed… normal_._

"I have to say you've proven me right so far; I mean I've been waiting for you to get out of school all day just so I could meet you and you haven't even thanked me. Are you mute? Because that would make this awkward all over again, you know? Here I am jabbering away to someone who can't even answer me back." Julian chuckled again.

Kurt shifted nervously on his feet. It was chilling how much his laugh reminded him of Blaine's.

"Or _won't _answer me back? Which is it, Kurt? Give me something to work with here because you're making me look like a fool either way."

Kurt readjusted his hold on his bag and lifted his head high. "What do you want?"

Julian beamed at him, his eyes scanning Kurt's excitedly. "He speaks! So straight forward and to the point too, how cute. Only four little words and I can already see why Blaine likes you so much."

"Look I have places to be so if you'll excuse me-" Kurt made for his locker but Julian held out his arm to block him.

"Not so fast puddin; don't you want to know why I'm here?"

Kurt waited silently for an answer.

"Oh come on. I've only just gotten you to speak, you can't stop now," Julian laughed. "Come on, ask me again. I promise I'll answer this time."

Kurt hesitated. Yes, he wanted to know why Julian was here of all places, but he had made up his mind last night that the best way to keep Julian out of his life was to avoid him at all cost. But still… that tingle of curiosity danced in his stomach, daring him to set foot in the deep end.

"Fine. What do you want?"

"I need your help."

Kurt cocked his eyebrow, "With?"

"Making my demo reel," Julian waved his video camera to emphasize his intentions. "It's just a short film, nothing major. If I can find the right person to help me with it then I can get the shots I need by the end of the week and get out of this poor excuse for a town. Really Kurt I don't know how you stand it, everything's so dull and colorless around here."

Kurt's heart pounded. Julian could be gone by the end of the week? It almost seemed too good to be true.

"Why do you need me?" he asked.

"Well I need a star, don't I?" Julian purred. "I wouldn't have much of a movie without one."

"H-How do you know I can act?" Kurt felt stupid for even questioning it. Somehow he got the feeling Julian knew much more about him than he should.

Julian scrunched his nose and smiled, "Lucky guess."

"I don't see why it has to be me," Kurt breathed. "Shouldn't you hold auditions or something?"

Kurt didn't know why he was being so on edge about this. Here Julian was practically waving his passport out of here in front of his face and Kurt wasn't even attempting to stamp it.

Julian cocked his head to the side. "Let's just say no one else can compare."

The last thing Kurt wanted to do was help Julian with anything. But helping to get rid of him? That was a whole different story. He wanted Julian out of both his and Blaine's lives as fast as possible. At the first sign of trouble he'd get out. After all, what's the worst Julian could do? If things got bad between them and Blaine loved him as much as he said he did he'd take Kurt's side in an instant… wouldn't he? Kurt gave him the benefit of the doubt. Their love was stronger than whatever bond he and Julian shared, and if Julian cared for Blaine at all then he wouldn't dare do anything that might upset him. Kurt didn't have anything to be afraid of.

"When do I start?"


	4. Chapter Four

**A/N: **Wow, okay guys what a wild month February has been! I am so, so sorry its taken me so long to update but I had everything from work drama to wisdom tooth pain, to the ER happen to me over the last three weeks and it's been so, so hard to write. I wanted to make this one a little lengthy to make up for the absence, but mind you when I was writing this I was in a lot of pain and on a lot of medication, so sorry if it's not my best. All in all I'm quite happy with it. I realized I couldn't jump into Kurt and Julian without giving a little more time to Julian and Blaine, so a good portion of this chapter is about them.

Thank you so much for all the amazing comments I've received! Seriously, each and every one has given me the motivation to keep this going, and you'll never know how much you're appreciated. Just knowing that there's a handful of you invested enough in this story to keep reading makes my heart soar. I love you all so much!

Also, I also decided to incorporate a song towards then end, because it sets the mood so well. If you don't know the song, it's called Perfect Day by Lou Reed

I highly recommend you check it out after you read this. Seriously guys, I don't care if you know it or not, if you don't listen to the song the end of the chapter will be pointless.

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><p>Blaine gazed heavily at Patricia. She was rambling intensely to his father about something she had heard on the news, pausing only to sip at her coffee. He couldn't tell if Wade was nodding his head in agreement or just to show that he was listening, either way he didn't really care. The only thing he did care about, he realized, was that his father was eating eggs.<p>

Blaine watched him from across the table with meek curiosity. Yes, Wade was definitely eating eggs.

Eggs and coffee...

On a whim he glanced down to find a plate of his own set before him, food completely untouched. Two sunny-side-up eggs, three linked sausages, and one piece of toast with strawberry jam. There was even a glass of orange juice to his left.

This must be breakfast.

Breakfast. Every morning before his parents headed off to work and he went to school.

Breakfast... Right.

With faint hesitation Blaine grabbed his fork and began jabbing at his food. He wasn't hungry in the slightest, but maybe if he smeared everything around on his plate it would look like he ate something, which was better than nothing. With a stifled yawn he began chopping at his sausage. Sleep had not come easily last night. Between the flashbacks of Julian and strange fantasies of Kurt, Blaine wondered if he had truly slept at all…

"I think your mother has a point, Blaine," Wade said, clearing his throat. "Why don't you swing by the office after school today so I can show you how it's done properly?"

Blaine looked up from his plate to find both of his parents staring at him expectantly. He couldn't admit that he wasn't listening; even if he wasn't an active participant in their morning conversations he was still expected to pay attention. In his stupor he considered using the excuse just this once, but that would steer the conversation into why he was so tired, and then what would he say? Because he was up all night thinking about the two people his father hated the most? Screw the hunting trip; Wade would ship him off to military school without a second thought.

"Sorry I- I have Warbler practice after school today," he lied quickly.

Patricia reached over to refill her husband's coffee. "Oh sweetie, I thought rehearsals were on Mondays and Wednesdays? When did it change?" she asked.

Fighting the sudden urge to kick her under the table, Blaine smiled at his mother and said through gritted teeth, "Emergency meeting."

"Well I can hardly see how singing could be qualified as an emergency," Wade huffed over his coffee.

Blaine's cheeks flushed. "We need to go over our set list," he mumbled.

As soon the words slipped he wanted to slap himself in the face. Set list? For what? Sectionals were just last week and both his parents were well aware that regionals weren't until March. This was the time for the Warblers to review their performances and note their strengths and weaknesses so they could form a solid game plan for regionals; hardly anything that would call for an emergency meeting.

Wade narrowed his eyes. "I think they'll do just fine without you."

Blaine peered up at the clock in desperation. Five after seven. When did it get so late? First period started at seven thirty and he wasn't even dressed.

"I'm sorry what did you need to show me again?" he asked.

"How to properly review a patent so you don't end up like Rupertson did yesterday. Loopholes aren't always your friend, Blaine. Just one could mean the downfall of your future."

Work. Of course Wade was talking about work. Blaine hadn't really expected him to be talking about anything else, but it unnerved him nonetheless. Ever since he could remember his dad had been pushing for him to become a lawyer so he could turn his law firm into a family business, which was a problem for two reasons: the first being that Blaine had no interest whatsoever in becoming a lawyer and the second being that, since he was gay, the line of the 'family business' would most likely end with him.

"That's great dad but I really don't have the time-"

"Nonsense. This is your senior year, Blaine. It's time to stop doo-whopping around with your friends and start working to better your future. There's a whole new life waiting for you outside of high school and from what I've seen you haven't shown the slightest interest in pursuing it. You should be grateful that I've taken it upon myself to do it for you; not every kid is so lucky."

Blaine played with the yolk of his egg as he listened, taking a keen interest in the way the sticky substance oozed from inside its bubble when he stabbed it.

"Your father has a point, darling. Graduation will be here before you know it and you'll have accomplished nothing if you keep letting these silly things get in your way. Maybe if you cleared your schedule a little you'd have more time to focus on the things that really matter. You're father and I have been thinking about this for a while, and I think it's time we ran it by you."

Food forgotten, Blaine's fork slid from his fingers with a clatter.

"What are you getting at?" he asked.

"We want you to quit the Warblers."

His father spoke as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, like saying you needed air to breathe.

"I don't understand," Blaine glanced between his parents anxiously. "I've always been a Warbler."

"My point exactly. You've been so caught up in rehearsals and performances that you haven't given yourself the time to even think about filling out college applications."

"So I'll apply tonight when I get home, I promise. I'll skip the meeting and come to your office so you can help-"

"No," Wade fixed his fork pointedly at his son. "I want you to go to the meeting and tell them you're done."

Blaine panicked. "You've never had a problem with the Warblers before."

"And it's a shame it's taken me this long to realize what a problem they actually are. I've always known that having such a demanding extracurricular would set a few speed bumps in your way, but it's apparent that they've grown into a road block."

"Why's that? Because I'd rather be practicing with them instead of staring at paperwork all night with you?"

Blaine noticed his father's shoulders stiffen; bracing himself against his words and preparing to throw them back in his face.

"Look, dad," he sighed. "Being a Warbler looks great on my high school record; how would it look if I quit now? Mom you said so yourself when I wanted to resign last year," Patricia avoided his gaze by taking a keen interest in straitening her napkin. "I don't get it. You're the ones who encouraged me to sign up for an extracurricular so I'd have something besides my GPA to put on college applications."

"I would have preferred something in the athletics department," Wade began with a huff, but Blaine cut him off. It was enough for his father to say the Warbler's were nothing but a distraction; he didn't need to hear him belittle them as well.

"Dad I love being a Warbler. All the singing and dancing and unity and teamwork, I can't get enough of it. It's my _passion_. I mean, isn't that what you wanted when you had me transferred; to become passionate about something?"

"No," Wade clenched his fist a little too tightly around the handle of his coffee mug. "We transferred you with the hope that you'd let go of all these meaningless distractions and make something useful of yourself."

Blaine got the feeling that 'meaningless distractions' meant Julian, but he held his tongue. The argument at hand was dangling the fate of nearly all his friends on a thread; one that would surely snap if he added the weight of one more- especially if that weight was Julian's.

"I'm not quitting the Warblers," he said firmly. "They need me. I'll skip practice and swing by the office to do paperwork with you tonight, but I'm not resigning. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get ready for school."

Wade opened his mouth to argue when Patricia grasped his arm gently. "Don't," she motioned to the clock on the wall. "You're both late enough as it is."

Blaine silently thanked his mother and excused himself from the table.

"This discussion isn't over," Wade sneered after his son.

* * *

><p>Blaine slammed his bedroom door closed. Just twenty minutes ago he figured his only challenge would be making it through school, but now he couldn't see how he'd possibly make it through the day. He was going to be late for class, there was a strong possibility that he'd be forced to quit the Warblers, he needed to fill out college applications before his father did it for him, and to top it all off the hunting trip was next weekend and he still hadn't figured out how to tell Kurt about it.<p>

_Great,_ he thought as he pulled off his shirt and whipped it over his shoulder. _If life wants to throw anything else my way, now would be the perfect time to do so. _

Just then a soft bundle of fabric hit his back. Blaine whirled around to find the tee shirt he tossed across the room lying in a heap at his feet. Curious, he bent down to grab it. Yeah, it was definitely the same shirt, still warm from the heat of his body… But how did it end up at his feet?

Eyebrows furrowed, he straightened to make for his dresser but was stopped short when he found himself nose to nose with Julian.

"You should watch where you throw things, Blaine. You never know who you might hit," he smiled.

Blaine jumped and covered Julian's mouth with a start, sparing a tentative glance towards the door for any sign that his parent's had heard him. When he was sure there were no sounds of movement from downstairs Blaine rounded back on Julian.

"What are you doing here?" he hissed.

Julian raised his eyebrows and lowered Blaine's hand from his mouth. "I came to see you, of course."

"But how- how did you get in here?" Blaine whispered.

Julian scanned Blaine's face with amusement. "You know how I got in."

Blaine didn't have to rack his mind too hard to realize he scaled the roof using the table on the deck. No phone call, no heads up, and certainly no indication that he'd be stopping by. Just like old times.

"I was pleased to find you kept your window unlocked for me after all these years," Julian purred.

"Or it could be that I forgot to lock it. Everything I do isn't with you in mind, you know."

Julian smirked and ruffled a hand through Blaine's hair. "You sound so sure of yourself, Blaine. It's cute. By the way, I'm disappointed in you."

Blaine cocked an eyebrow. Julian had been here for all of three minutes; he didn't have time to do anything to disappoint him.

"For what," he asked.

"For not trying to prove me wrong the other night when I said you're too thin. Had you taken off your shirt I would have kept my mouth shut," Julian smirked.

Blaine couldn't help but smile back. Here he thought that Julian had stopped by to dump another problem on his shoulders when really he was just… _being Julian._

"So you're calling me fat now," he laughed, swatting at Julian's shoulder with his shirt.

Julian caught the sleeve as it came at him and pulled Blaine in close. "Please," he chuckled, running a finger down his abdomen. "As much as it pains me to give you a compliant without having you work for it, I have to admit you look good."

Blaine smirked. "I told you, it comes with the Warbler package-" he began, but had to cut himself short. There may not be a Warbler package soon…

Julian smiled knowingly. "Don't look so blue Blaine; it's really not your color. I can think of a million ways to keep you active after you've quit."

Blaine frowned and rubbed the back of his head. "You heard all that, huh?"

"That's the beauty of ventilation systems; they speak up when walls can't."

An echo of chairs sliding across the kitchen floor snapped Blaine back to the situation at hand.

"Look Julian, it's great to see you and everything, but you really have to go. I'm late to class as it is and if my parents catch you here they'd kill us both."

Julian strolled over to Blaine's closet and began shifting through his clothes. "So put on a shirt and let's go."

"_Let's?_ No, Julian there is no _let's-_"

Julian tossed Blaine a sweater, "This one. No blazer today, you're playing hooky."

"You're joking."

"I assure you I haven't changed that much over the years."

Blaine glared at him over the sweater. "I can't just _skip_ school."

"You'll do as I tell you," Julian warned, crossing to the window. "We have more important things to take care of today."

"Can't it wait until later?" Blaine felt stupid for even asking. When Julian needed something done he expected the results to be instant. Waiting didn't exist in his vocabulary.

"If you won't meet me at the car willingly I'd be more than happy to drag you down the stairs and out the front door myself. I've been itching to give Wade a piece of my mind anyway. Which do you prefer?"

Somewhere within Blaine's silence Julian found his answer. "I'll meet you at the car," he smirked, ruffling Blaine's hair once more before disappearing silently out the window.

Blaine bit his lip. The clock on his wall read twenty after seven. It took forty five minutes to get to Dalton. If he left now he'd make it in time to catch the second half of first period, but he'd be marked as absent instead of tardy. If he was going to be absent from one class then he might as well miss all the others too; it was only fair. With a heavy sigh Blaine threw on his sweater and coat, grabbing his Dalton blazer for good measure. If he had to skip then he sure as hell wasn't going to get caught.

He rushed down the stairs a minute later, making a point to have his mother hold his blazer while he tied his shoe. With a quick kiss goodbye Blaine was out the door and at his SUV where Julian was already sitting in the passenger seat fiddling with his camcorder.

"Where to," he asked, backing out of the driveway and away from whatever guilt that still lingered.

Julian shrugged, "Anywhere."

* * *

><p>Kurt glanced at the clock above the whiteboard for what felt like the hundredth time since class began ten minutes ago. Most days he'd be mortified that only so few minutes had passed, but today he willed the hands of the clock to move slower. Julian had arranged to meet him downtown at ten (Kurt only agreed to the time because his curfew was midnight, giving him a perfectly justifiable excuse to split early) and he was anything but excited. Now that the initial shock of meeting him was over, Kurt was only left with his confusion. Yes, Julian was every bit as intimidating as he imagined, but nowhere near as vile as Patricia made him out to be. He was straightforward, easy talking, and somewhat lighthearted, although his comments about Kurt were anything but flattery. Kurt could see why Blaine would take a liking to him. If the time Blaine spent at his old high school was every bit of a nightmare as it came across then he supposed having someone like Julian to cling to would have been useful. Still, he refused to let his guard down. Patricia wouldn't have said those things if there hadn't been a reason.<p>

His phone vibrated against his thigh, alerting him of a new message. Kurt let out a small sigh. He had wondered how long it would take before Blaine began their annual string of daily text messages. Normally he would jump at the chance to talk to his boyfriend, but right now Blaine was the last person he wanted to talk to. Julian's smile was still fresh in his mind and he had no idea how Blaine would react if he told him his best friend had sought out his boyfriend without his knowledge. Would he be offended or excited? Either reaction would end poorly. If he was offended he might get mad at both Julian and Kurt for meeting behind his back, but if he was excited there was a strong possibility he'd attempt to get the three of them to hang out together. Kurt remained apt in his decision to stay away from Julian as much as possible. He already signed up to work with him on his project, there was no changing that, but seeing him during his free time when he could be with his friends or spending alone time with his boyfriend was out of the question. Besides, he remembered all too well how Blaine had reacted when he first heard from Julian and was certain that he wasn't ready to see the two of them together just yet.

Almost against his will Kurt fished his phone from his pocket and frowned when he saw Wes' name lighting the screen. Wes was one of Blaine's good friends, but he was nothing more than an acquaintance to Kurt. The last time they had spoken was to put together a surprise birthday party for Blaine using the Warbler's practice room, but that was during his time at Dalton, and for a perfectly good reason. Why would he be contacting him now?

Kurt unlocked his phone and opened the message, which simply read _Where's Blaine?_ He glanced at the time on the screen and sent back a leisured response.

_(12:42) I don't know how it escaped you but I no longer attend Dalton. You can't possibly expect me to know where he is at any given moment anymore._

Wes responded almost instantly.

_(12:42) I didn't see him during passing time. _

_(12:43) He's only human, Wes. Maybe he went to the bathroom? _

Two minutes passed and Wes hadn't responded. Kurt was just beginning to think he accepted his argument when his cell phone buzzed again.

_(12:45) Jeff says he failed to show in first period. _

As silly as the conversation was, Kurt couldn't help but keep a small trickle of anxiety from running down his spine.

_(12:46) So he woke up late. It happens._

Blaine did look exhausted when he saw him last. It was possible that sleep had finally caught up with him. Then again, sleep or no sleep perfect attendance was something his boyfriend prided himself on. It was out of character for him to be tardy, let alone miss an entire class. But Kurt said so himself- he was only human.

_(12:48) Late enough to miss third period as well? _

Kurt stumbled over the keypad, cursing it for being so small.

_(12:49) Who said anything about missing third period?_

Now that he thought about it, the school day was almost over and Blaine hadn't attempted to get a hold of him at all, which was strange considering his short attention span and how bored his second period Economics class made him.

_(12:51) Thad. _

Kurt considered this. From what he remembered Thad wasn't the most observant student at Dalton. Still, Blaine missing a class would be as obvious as the whiteboard going missing. Blaine was always there; if a professor didn't make a comment during role call then a fellow classmate would have.

_(12:54) You're telling me no one's tried texting him? _

_(12:55) We just did, he won't answer. Have you?_

_(12:56) Not yet._

_(12:56) Why not?_

Kurt tightened his grip on his phone. He didn't need to justify himself to Wes, or to any of the other Warbler's who were undoubtedly following their conversation over his shoulder.

_(12:59) That's none of your business. You guys are his friends, you should have been trying to get a hold of him the moment you realized he was gone._

_(1:01) And you're his boyfriend. Which volume speaks louder?_

Kurt turned off his phone and threw it into his bag. If Blaine wasn't answering their text messages then who could say he'd answer his? Besides, if anything bad had happened he was almost certain Patricia would have informed him by now. Their late night phone call wasn't exactly the best way to get to know each other, but despite the circumstances of the conversation she seemed to trust him well enough to keep him updated on anything that may have happened between Blaine and Julian.

Kurt laid his head onto the table and let his mind wander. Why had she even bothered to call him at all? Was it out of concern or did she just want to use him to keep close tabs on what Blaine was up to? Blaine told him once that image meant everything to his family, but what did that mean? If Blaine was caught doing something that his parents deemed inappropriate would they whisk him away for the sake of keeping appearances? Yes, Julian had done some awful things to people, but nothing that couldn't be justified. What if her concern wasn't for Blaine's wellbeing, but for the trouble Julian seems to land him in when he's around? Kurt closed his eyes. No, he couldn't think like that. She was Blaine's mother, after all. If that were the case she wouldn't have bothered to mention the bruises and broken bones...

Someone behind him laughed about class being over soon, driving Kurt's attention back to Julian himself. Would it have been better if he didn't know anything about Julian at all? Would he have even agreed to do the movie with him if he hadn't? He didn't want to know the answer. Julian was here and he wasn't going anywhere. If he could find the strength to put up with him and get through this stupid project then it didn't matter. Julian would be gone and Blaine would be his again and he wouldn't be having all these crazy thoughts anymore. He didn't care if it was selfish; he just wanted everything to go back to the way it was before.

Kurt squeezed his eyes tighter, a tear rolling silently down his cheek.

Maybe everything was going back to the way it was before.

* * *

><p>It was nearing five now and Blaine was positively exhausted. His initial excitement when Julian told him they were going to be working on his film had subsided into passiveness as the day progressed. As it turned out the only thing Julian needed from him was his knowledge of the area so he could get scenery shots to compile his setting. When Blaine wasn't driving much of the day was spent watching idly while Julian stared at trees and filmed dead leaves blowing across the pavement. It left Blaine feeling a little dejected. Eventually he pitched the idea of taking up a role in addition to simply driving him around all day when he discovered, much to his surprise, that Julian already had all the actors he needed; responding with nothing more than a sly smirk when Blaine asked who he had found on such short notice.<p>

The two hadn't spoken much after that. After a while Julian suggested ditching the car and going for a walk through Lima's small recreational park, which Blaine was more than thankful for; if he had to sit in that stifled heat any longer there was a risk he'd fall asleep at the wheel.

He strode silently down the wooded trail after Julian, both allowing the crunch of leaves to fill in for their absent conversation. Julian's breath came out as a thick billow of smoke that trailed off far behind him while Blaine's was small and thin, like a candle that had just been blown out. Blaine considered asking if he took up smoking since they met last when Julian stopped abruptly, halting Blaine in his tracks.

"This is it," he smiled, taking his camcorder from his bag. "I assumed this place would be as much as a joke as the rest of this town, but this is exactly what I've been looking for."

Blaine looked around the clearing ahead. Whatever it was that made this part of the woods any better than the rest was beyond him; the bare trees were all identical and the ground looked just as damp as it did anywhere else. But Julian saw something special, and that was all that mattered.

He watched him film quietly for fifteen minutes before Julian headed to the center of the clearing, holding out his hand for Blaine to join him. With a tired smile Blaine crossed the field and took it, thankful to receive some sort of acknowledgment other than curt instructions on where to stand so he wouldn't be in the way.

"Do you hear that?"

Blaine strained his ears, listening for anything out of the ordinary. When nothing came he turned to Julian. "Hear what?"

"The chains," Julian smiled.

Blaine looked at him inquisitively. "What chains?"

Julian rolled his eyes and readjusted his hold on Blaine's hand, leading him away from the clearing and back to the trail. "I figured your pathetic lack of observation would have sharpened by now, seeing how I wasn't around to protect you all this time, but apparently it's only grown duller."

"Zero tolerance will do that to you," Blaine smiled. "I didn't need protecting."

"Maybe not there, but you wouldn't last five minutes out here. There's a whole life waiting for you outside of that school, and it's not as sugarcoated or forgiving. You have to keep your wits about you," he smirked, guiding Blaine around the bend of the path. "You never know what could be waiting for you around the corner."

Tucked away in an overgrown clearing off the path sat an old playground. The windblown scatter of dead leaves across the surfaces of the equipment indicated that it had been long since abandoned. A pair of rusted swings dangled pathetically in the back by their chains. The slide had lost its luster to rust a long time ago. A set of metal monkey bars sat caked in dirt from years of inactivity. But it was the carousel that caught Blaine's eye most of all. It too had fallen victim to filth and rust, its circumference jagged with dirt and vines, but somewhere under its neglected veneer Blaine could make out small chips of red paint. The paint hadn't chipped from negligence alone; but from an entire lifetime of usage. Once upon a time it had been the most loved contraption in this park. Generations of children had fought over whose turn it was to grasp its smooth bars and spin until the world around them obscured together, somehow making absolutely perfect and completely no sense at all. Now all that remained was a shell; a ghost of children's laughter and memories long forgotten in the blur of the wheel of adulthood they were forced to step onto. In some strange way Blaine sympathized with it. He smiled somewhat sadly at Julian and squeezed his hand. Not just for the carousel, but for the park itself. Dark snow clouds hung low above it, the disappearing sun drenching it in shadow. Greens and browns of the grass and tress paled in its ashen haze. A light mist clung at its feet. Everything was tinted grey here, and for the first time in what felt like forever Blaine felt a strong pang of affinity for the world around him.

"It's…"

"I know," Julian whispered, squeezing Blaine's hand in comprehension. "It's beautiful."

The two walked hand in hand to the swings. "Shouldn't you be filming this," Blaine asked, running his hand along the slide's railing as they passed. "It's the best thing we've come across all day."

Julian shook his head. "No. Cameras distort the things they capture if the lighting is off. Looking back on the recording wouldn't be striking as it is right now."

The chains of the swing set shrieked in protest when they sat down. Blaine didn't think they were weak enough to snap but he kept his feet planted firmly on the ground anyway. "So finding this place was a waste?" he asked dejectedly.

"I wouldn't say that."

"If you can't film it then what's the point in being here?"

Julian brought his backpack to his lap and began shifting around inside. "Just because I can't use it for my project doesn't mean I don't want to use it for something else."

"What else could you possibly want to use it for?" Blaine asked.

"The setting to a memory," Julian stopped shuffling around his bag and pulled out a fifth of whiskey. "I can't film it but that doesn't mean I want to forget it. I want to be able to look back on this as the day we officially reunited. It really is a fitting setting Blaine, with all the grey. Black and white coming together as one," Julian unscrewed the cap and took a shot before offering the bottle to Blaine.

Blaine took it apprehensively. "Where did you get this?"

"Wade always stashes a bottle or two in his closet in case your mother goes on one of her kicks," he smirked. "Don't tell me you've forgotten?"

"My parent's room is off limits, Julian." Blaine groaned. "You know that. Is that the reason you snuck in this morning? What's he going to do when he realizes it's gone?"

Julian shrugged. "I wouldn't know. He's not my father."

"Well I do. He's going to kick my ass."

Julian swung his swing to the side and nudged Blaine with his shoulder. "Better drink up then. If you're going against his fists it shouldn't be for nothing."

Blaine shook his head and stared down the neck of the bottle. Julian hung on his every feature.

"Drinking is for celebration, Blaine," he whispered. "Aren't you happy to see me again?"

Blaine closed his eyes and willed the goose bumps on his spine to disappear. Of course he was happy to see Julian, but saying it wouldn't be enough; he had to prove it. If this was how Julian wanted him to show his appreciation then he didn't have a choice. With a crunch of his nose he tipped the bottle to his lips and drunk, Julian's gaze never leaving his face. The smell alone was enough to make him sick, but the burn that accompanied it was the worst. After two struggled sips Blaine removed the bottle from his lips and cringed.

"You can do better than that," Julian sing-songed, but his expression was anything but lighthearted.

Blaine glared sideways at him and returned the bottle to his lips, holding his breath in an effort to relieve at least one of his senses from the poison. It didn't work as well as he had hoped, but it helped. He managed to keep the whiskey flowing freely down his throat for nearly ten seconds before it closed in protest, making him choke. Julian smiled and rubbed reassuring circles over his shoulder blade. "Let me have your phone."

Blaine squinted at him over his hand. "Why," he coughed through his fingers.

"So I can put on some music. We can't drink in silence now can we? This is a celebration, Blaine. Not a grieving."

Blaine gestured for him to take his phone from his coat pocked while he coughed. When Julian saw the alerts of missed calls and messages on the screen his smile faltered.

"My, aren't you the popular one?" he sneered. "So many missed messages, all from different people. From the way they cling I'd assume Kurt's not the only one you're fucking."

"They're my friends, Julian. They probably missed me." Blaine's stomach sank. "I didn't tell anyone where I was."

"Rightly so, it's none of their business. Drink." Julian shoved the bottle back at Blaine and dismissed his notifications.

Blaine hesitated before holding out his hand for the phone. In lieu of how tired he was and running around with Julian all day he had completely forgotten to text Kurt. He was probably worried sick by now. "I should probably-"

"I said drink!" Julian snapped. "I waited two years to have you; they can wait a few more hours."

Blaine opened his mouth to protest but stopped himself short. Julian had a point. Was there really a difference between calling Kurt now as opposed to in a couple hours? He supposed not. Besides, Julian became riled at the mere sight of Kurt's picture; it probably wasn't the best idea to talk to him in his presence. Either way, the thought wasn't comforting enough to keep the guilt from boiling in his stomach.

Julian dropped his shoulders and prodded Blaine with his foot. "What was it Eric used to say, huh? Hang with the best and fuck the rest."

Blaine looked at him with a start, the mention of Eric's name flooding him with memories he hadn't realized he forgotten. Eric, the hopeless freshman who had more pimples than friends and more brains than anyone else at Cottingham. Eric, the white boy who wanted to be a rapper and claimed to know more about twinkies than anyone in Ohio. Eric, who didn't see a difference between fat girls and skinny girls because they still had breasts either way. Eric, the only other person who had the balls to be his friend apart from Julian. Who didn't mind being christened a fag for hanging out with the gay kid. Eric… the boy who died too soon.

With a deep sigh Blaine brought the bottle to his lips and looked fondly at his friend. This was why Julian had come back; to remind him of the things he had been too scared to remember. What if it had been Julian that died that night instead of Eric? Would Eric have sought him out after all this time to keep his memory alive, or would he have done his best to forget, like Blaine had? There was no way to know. But Blaine did know that right now, in this very moment he was exactly where he needed to be, and Julian was the only person he should be with. With a smile he tilted the bottle at Julian and took another swig, "Fuck the rest."

* * *

><p><em>Just a perfect day <em>

_Drink Sangria in the park _

_And then later when it gets dark _

_We go home_

The park's grey hue had seamlessly eroded into black some time ago. Blaine couldn't quite remember when he first noticed the sun was gone, but he didn't mind; the whiskey warmed him better now than it had all day. He didn't miss the light so much; his eyes adjusted fairly well to his surroundings and Julian said it was always better to drink at night anyway, which he found to be true. Drinking in the dark made you braver. The woods never really got to him during the day but at night he was certain everyone was at least a little creeped out by them, you'd be lying if you said you weren't. With the night came the shadows, and with the shadows came the uncertainty. The trees merged together and every bustle of a bush sent your imagination reeling. What sort of predators lay concealed in the thickets? Alcohol or not, you could never quite escape the feeling that you were being watched. Drinking just made you care less.

A good period of time was passed drinking on the swings. Julian had made some sort of drinking game out of who could swing the highest, which eventually turned into who could jump the furthest when Blaine's swing started whining a little too loudly whenever he reached a certain elevation. The seat of Julian's swing snapped off in protest after a while and that lead to a whole new game of seeing who could climb up the dangling chains the fastest, which Blaine lost by default when his chain broke from the beam halfway up.

After that the whiskey had set in and the swing set had lost any appeal it may have had before the two had pushed it too far. Blaine was reaching an uncomfortable excitement where he had to keep his body moving and wondered aloud if the slide would prove more useful than the swings had been. As it turned out the steps of the ladder were far too rusted to tempt, but that didn't keep them from clambering up the slide itself and shouting ridiculous movie quotes when they reached the top. Blaine found that there was just enough room at the peak for the both of them to stand and observe the layout of the park if he clung close to Julian, which made him smile. His balance may have been tossed from the booze but Julian stood strong and sturdy as ever. He felt more secure holding onto him than the railing of some slide, anyway.

_Just a perfect day _

_Feed animals in the zoo _

_Then later a movie too _

_And then home_

Julian wasn't quite on Blaine's level yet, insisting that his tolerance was higher from years of practice. They ran down the slide (Julian catching Blaine around the middle when he stumbled toward the ground) and made their way over to the monkey bars to drink more. At this point Blaine couldn't stop laughing. His sides hurt and there were times where he had to stop walking just so he could sit and catch his breath. It was ridiculous really, the monkey bars were only twenty feet away but he couldn't go five without dropping to his knees. Julian was patient though, laughing along with him most of the time at whatever memory of the two slurred from his mouth.

The fourth time Julian pulled him to his feet he turned Blaine away from the direction they were heading.

"Where are we going," Blaine chuckled.

Julian smiled, "Detour."

"_Youra liar,"_ Blaine slurred, "The monkey bars are right _there!"_

"It's a surprise."

"Surprise? Oh no. No, no no no no _no_. _Julian!_ I hate surprises-"

Julian covered Blaine's mouth and laughed. "_Shh!_ You have to be quiet or you'll ruin it."

Blaine continued to mumble quietly through Julian's hands, his sense of curiosity peaking the further the park became. After fifty feet Julian stopped walking and let go of Blaine's face to bring a finger to his lips.

"_Shh."_

Blaine held back a giggle and mimicked the action, pressing own his finger to Julian's lips. Julian crunched his nose and smiled, gesturing with his head to the cluster of woods ahead.

"Look," he whispered.

A group of geese lay sleeping at the edge of a small pond. Blaine made a drunken noise that bordered somewhere between excitement and affection, causing a couple of them to stir. Julian knocked him over the head playfully.

"I saw them from the top of the slide," he whispered. "They shouldn't be sleeping so early. Too afraid of the dark to face it head on, the sissies."

"_Sissies,"_ Blaine agreed, nodding his head profusely. "Let's teach 'em a lesson."

Julian smiled widely and took off towards the geese, Blaine close at his heels.

"Sissies," Blaine shouted, waving his arms drunkenly. "Sissies! Wake up ya sissies!"

The geese slowly got to their feet with aggravated honks and began wobbling off.

"Come on Anderson, they're getting away," Julian laughed, grabbing Blaine's wrist and propelling him faster toward the pond.

They ran around the water in a drunken haze, shouting and shooing the geese from their slumber. Julian tried to catch one, only to succeed in sliding feet first into the pond, making Blaine double over in laughter until Julian sent a wave went flying his way.

"_Jesus Christ_ that's cold," he sputtered, rubbing the water from his face.

"That's what you get for laughing," Julian smiled.

"Oh that's what I get, huh? Wanna know what you get?" Blaine jumped into the pond and splashed Julian back, initiating a playful wrestling match on the embankment. The two fell from the pond and tossed and turned in the mud for a long time; Blaine giving teasing slaps when he had the upper hand and Julian thrusting his hips into his when he managed to stay on top.

Blaine found himself fighting back a little less when he did this.

_Oh it's such a perfect day_

_ I'm glad I spent it with you_

_ Oh such a perfect day _

_You just keep me hanging on _

_You just keep me hanging on_

Blaine quickly fell back into his fit of laughter when they returned to the park. Julian didn't help his cause when he started making up ridiculous things to do on the monkey bars. Blaine's personal favorite was a drinking game Julian called _cliffhanger_. The two would start at opposite sides and swing across the bars until they met in the middle, where they would hang on by one hand and wrestle until the other one lost their grip, the one that fell first having to drink.

When _cliffhanger_ proved to be too strenuous they settled on hanging upside down by the back of their knees and taking shots. Blaine didn't know if it was the blood or the alcohol rushing to his head that made Julian's smile look so much like Kurt's but either way it made him feel sick. Kurt already had it in his mind that he would cheat on him with Julian, how would he feel if he knew he was spending his day drinking with him in an abandoned park?

"You're thinking," Julian stated.

"I am."

Gravity pulled Blaine's lips into a bigger smile than he intended, but he was sure Julian got the hint he wasn't happy.

"What about?"

Blaine sighed. "This is fun and all Julian, but we shouldn't be doing this. Maybe it was okay before but it's not anymore."

Julian frowned and pulled himself upright, Blaine following suit.

"Because of Kurt."

Blaine nodded. The mix of alcohol and blood began to drain from his ears, making him lightheaded.

"I see," Julian said slowly. "I better get you home then. We wouldn't want to make him uncomfortable having you out all night now would we?"

"Thanks for understanding," Blaine muttered. He didn't feel good. His body was too heavy and everything was swimming in strange ways.

Julian hopped off the monkey bars and helped Blaine down. When Blaine held onto his shoulders a little too fiercely to try to find his footing Julian smirked. "Hold onto me, I won't let you fall."

With a muffled thank you the two made their way silently through the park. Blaine was more than grateful for Julian's understanding. The initial shock of him having a boyfriend must have worn off since the last time they saw each other; which would explain why Julian had failed to mention Kurt at all today.

_Just a perfect day _

_Problems all left alone_

_ Weekenders on our own _

_It's such fun_

A strong breeze beat against their backs, making Blaine stumble. Somewhere beside them came a high pitched whine. He looked over to see the carousel attempting feebly to turn against the wind. Julian followed his gaze and stopped. "Get on," he said sternly.

Blaine lifted his eyebrows, "On that?"

"It's the only thing in this place we haven't touched, you might as well. I know how much you like it."

Blaine hesitantly looked back at the carousel. Julian was right, he did like it, but it was too dark now to see the chips of paint and the shadows from the trees made it look menacing.

"What if it doesn't work anymore?"

"Only one way to find out."

Blaine let himself be guided to the piece of equipment. Julian let go of his hand and gave it a heavy spin to knock off the branches and leaves that coated its surface. It seemed to spin alright; wobbling on its axis only when it slowed, but the shriek of the metal made Blaine cringe. Julian caught one of its bars to stop it and gestured for him to step on.

"I dunno Jules; my stomach might not be able to handle it."

"Get on."

Blaine took a step backwards. "I'd really rather not-"

"Do as I tell you and _get on_," Julian hissed through gritted teeth.

With a hard swallow Blaine stepped onto the carousel and stared at Julian.

"Sit," Julian smiled, "This'll be fun, I promise."

Blaine sat down tentatively, gripping the frozen handle bars as tight as he could. Julian took a bar in his hand and started walking, spinning the merry go round slowly. Blaine let himself relax a little. The action wasn't as upsetting as he assumed it would be; in fact it was somewhat soothing.

"You know I've wanted to talk to you about something, Blaine. I guess now is as good of a time as ever." Julian stopped walking and began pushing the carousal with one hand. "It's actually quite fitting; having you like this. I'll admit it's not usually my style, but it'll make it easier to emphasize my point without getting my hands dirty."

Suddenly Blaine wanted off. He knew the reprehending tone in Julian's voice all too well. Whatever he wanted to say wasn't something Blaine should take lightly, and he was determined to make sure he didn't.

"Julian I-"

"_Shut up,"_ Julian snapped, spinning the wheel faster. "I haven't been very impressed with the way you've been treating me, Blaine. In fact I haven't been impressed at all. I had hoped you got the message earlier today when I made you skip so you could follow me around all day like a lap dog, but seeing how you've haven't apologized yet I realize it's going to take a lot more than putting you on the backburner for a few hours for you to get the point."

Blaine drew his knees to his chest in an effort to calm his flaring stomach. "I don't know what you're talking about," he groaned.

"Don't you?" Julian yelled, spinning the carousel swiftly. Everything began to blur into a smudge of black and grey, making Blaine's head spin in the opposite direction the whiskey was swaying him. "You may not have said it, but I know you felt it when you asked to take a role in my project, to do something other than follow me around while I worked. I had barely acknowledged you existed until then, concentrating only on my camera and ignoring you whenever you spoke."

Yes, Blaine knew what he was talking about, but he didn't understand. The faster Julian spun him the more dislocated he felt from his body. His brain rolled around freely inside his skull, the fluid in his ears breaking against it in ruthlessly whenever it lolled too close.

"Stop Jules," he pleaded. "Whatever I did, I'm sorry, okay? Just let me off!"

"Let me spell it out for you," Julian shouted, his voice radiating through the night. "When you woke up this morning what did you have planned for the day?"

"I-I don't know," Blaine tightened his grip on the rusted bars as the wheel spun faster, his fingers stinging from the bitter wind.

"Yes, you do! What were your plans for the day?"

Bile burned at Blaine's throat. He squeezed his eyes closed in an attempt to keep the vertigo at bay, but somehow that only made it worse. "I don't know," he shouted. "Go to school! Be with my friends! Homework-" If Blaine could think of anything else he sure as hell couldn't say it. The alcohol came flooding up this throat and it took all the strength he had to swallow it back down.

"Tell me then, Blaine. Did it bother you to drop everything just to be with someone, only to find you've been forgotten in lieu of something else?"

_Just a perfect day_

_ You made me forget myself_

_ I thought I was someone else _

_Someone good_

The realization hit Blaine like a hurricane. Kurt. This was about Kurt. How could he have been so stupid? Julian hadn't accepted Kurt at all. The only reason he made him skip school today was to shove it down his throat. And it was working.

Julian stopped the carousel with a jerk. The sudden stillness made Blaine's insides lurch. He rolled onto his knees and clutched the wheel desperately, hanging his head off the side for air. The wheel whined under Julian's weight when he stepped on and crossed over to Blaine, kneeling at his side.

"Throw up," he demanded.

Maybe it was the faint breeze on the back of his neck or maybe it was simply because Julian voiced what his body had been screaming for him to do, but either way Blaine became acutely aware of the way his head hung loosely in the air; causing him to feel like he was still spinning long after he stopped. He should throw up, needed to throw up, but in his twisted logic to do so would to admit he was wrong.

"Throw up and I'll let you lie down."

Yes, that's what he wanted- to lie down. To have some sort of stability to anchor him back into his own. He tried to tell Julian that was all he needed but somewhere along the line his voice box had twisted itself around his tongue, distorting his words into a sickly moan. Julian ran his fingers through Blaine's hair, pulling his bangs away from his forehead. The simple act was like opening the floodgates to a dam, forcing Blaine's stomach to unscrew itself onto the ground below his palms.

When he finished Julian let his hair fall to his face. "Spit," he ordered.

Blaine breathed deeply, a thin spool of saliva and bile dangling from his lips. "Fuck you," he panted.

In one swift movement Julian threw him on his back and straddled him at the waist. The action alone was enough to make him gasp, but it was the swift sting of the back of Julian's hand that took his breath away.

"You think I don't know how this feels," Julian shouted, grasping Blaine's jaw in his steely grip and bringing his face to his. "My head spun when I found out about him! The look in your eyes made me sick! Everything you're feeling right now is exactly how I felt the other night!"

"I-I'm sorry…" Blaine's voice came out as barely a whisper.

"Are you? So what, you expect _me_ to apologize now for making you feel as sick and confused as I did, huh? Is that it?" Julian shouted, tightening his grip on Blaine's jaw.

"No," Blaine mouthed the word noiselessly a few times before he managed to spit it out.

"No? And why's that, huh? Why shouldn't I apologize for fucking with you?"

Blaine swallowed hard, fighting to keep his voice from shaking.

"Because I… Because I deserved it."

He didn't say it because he thought that was what Julian wanted to hear; he said it because he believed it. He deserved anything Julian decided to do to him, because he was right; Blaine was in the wrong. He should have told Julian about Kurt the second he called, but some selfish part of him didn't want to, and look where that landed him.

Selfish.

Blaine almost forgot.

He wasn't allowed to be selfish when it came to Julian.

Three grueling minutes passed while Julian scanned his face. Blaine felt his insides collapse in on themselves. Julian made him feel so small when he got like this. It scared him more than anything, how disposable his body became under his grip; like he could shatter him in an instant.

When Julian decided Blaine meant what he said he cocked his head to the side and ran a thumb over the cheek he struck.

"Look at what you make me do to you," he whispered, resting his forehead against Blaine's. "After all this time you'd think you'd learn. You didn't think I'd let you off the hook that easy now, did you? Hiding someone like Kurt from me? If he meant so much to you, shouldn't you have told me about him straight away, instead of keeping me in the dark like that? Instead of making me look like a fool?"

Blaine avoided his eyes, but that didn't make his words sting any less.

"You used to tell me everything, Blaine. I had to make sure you understood how much that hurt me."

"I'm so sorry," Blaine whispered, his voice cracking in shame. "I never meant to hurt you."

"Come here." Julian wrapped his arms around him and rubbed soothing circles across his back. "God, you're shaking. It's okay, I'm not going to strike you again. Wanna sing a song, hmm? It used to calm you down all the time. I'll start and you join it when you're ready. _Oh it's such a perfect day, I'm glad I spent it with you."_

Blaine squeezed his eyes shut and clung tightly to Julian's coat, willing himself not to cry. He hadn't done so six years; he sure as hell wasn't going to start now.

"_Oh such a perfect day, you just keep me hanging on..."_

Julian shook Blaine's shoulder gently. Blaine didn't feel much like singing, but he also didn't want to hurt Julian's feelings again.

"_You just keep me hanging on," _he echoed.

"Good boy," Julian smiled. "Look Blaine, I want you to be open with me again. No more secrets, no more hiding, complete honesty, okay?"

Blaine nodded his head against his chest to show he understood.

"I'm just worried about you. I know I have a crappy way of showing it, but it's the truth," Julian chuckled a little and rested his head against Blaine's. "I don't know who this Kurt kid is, but you seem to care about him a lot. I just want to be sure he's good enough for you; that he won't hurt you."

"Kurt would never hurt me," Blaine muttered.

"How can you be so sure?"

He hesitated for a second before responding, "Because we love each other."

"Which makes it that much easier for him to hurt you. Look, I'm not doubting his feelings for you, but if you got hurt because of him I'd never be able to forgive myself for not seeing it coming. Just… put my mind at ease and help me understand him, okay? I want to know everything. What makes him tick, how he works. Will you do that for me?"

"But why-"

"It doesn't matter why, all that matters is that I'm trying, right? Look, I'm not saying knowing about him will make me like him, but it'll make me feel better knowing what kind of person holds your heart. You want me to feel better about this, don't you?"

Blaine didn't quite understand where Julian was coming from, but he must have had a reason for saying all of this. He always did have Blaine's best intentions at heart; it would be silly to think something as important as love wouldn't be one of them.

"W-What do you want to know?"

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><p><em>You're going to reap just what you sow<em>

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><p>Until now the flood of worried texts and missed phone calls wasn't what worried Blaine about skipping school. It wasn't that he'd missed out on a boatload of work, skipped Warbler practice, or even that he'd ruined the new pea coat Kurt got him as an early Christmas present. No, until now Blaine didn't have any regrets about spending all day with Julian.<p>

Then again, until now his father hadn't been standing before him, belt in hand.

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><p><em>You're going to reap just what you sow<em>


	5. Chapter Five

A/N: Finally, a chapter with Julian and Kurt! Man did these boys give me trouble. Just a quick reminder in case you need reassuring, this is indeed a Klaine fic, and you'll get more of them in the next chapter. Julian just needs to stir up a few things first.

Also, there is a song mentioned towards the end of this chapter. It's something you all should know, and it wasn't just thrown in for no reason. It adds meaning to the story that won't become apparent until later down the road. Think of it as foreshadowing. Please feel free to speculate on what's to come and review!

* * *

><p>It was amazing what little effort it took to transform the dreary downtown square into a charming display of Christmas spirit. Trees lining the streets were clocked in white lights. Wreaths hung loosely from lampposts, each tied by red bows and golden bells. Tornado sirens had been rigged to broadcast Christmas carols throughout the day, and the shops framing the streets were all adorned with whimsical paintings of snowflakes on their windows.<p>

All the lights and decorations paved a trail to City Hall, which was perhaps the most festive of all. Where there had only been a pavilion before, a skating rink now sat in its courtyard, the lights above it strung in half-hazard crisscrosses that hung loosely in odd places. Floodlit ice-sculptures branched out from an enormous evergreen tree that twinkled silently at the head of the rink. The tree itself was nothing too extravagant; its lopsided lights serving as an evident reminder of the rush whoever was unlucky enough to hang them was in to escape the brisk November weather, but it was charming nonetheless.

It was here that Kurt leaned against the railing of the ice rink, examining his fingernails coolly. Julian was over an hour late. Frankly Kurt was surprised he waited around this long for him; had it been anyone else he would have stormed away long ago instead of subjecting his pristinely kept skin to the frigid wind, but his curiosity kept him anchored. Why exactly had Julian sought out him of all people to help with his project? True, there weren't many actors around Lima, and the few there were probably weren't holding their breath for a chance to star in some measly college film, but surely there had to be someone more enticing and qualified to play whatever role Julian had in mind, so why him?

_"Let's just say no one else can compare." _

A chill ran down Kurt's spine that had nothing to do with the weather. With an exhausted sigh he turned his gaze to the clock tower behind him. 11:04. That gave him forty five minutes with Julian at the most. Normally Kurt didn't mind his curfew; Burt's shift at GM started at midnight and he liked knowing his son was safe at home before he left for the night, but that didn't keep Kurt from becoming disgruntled about it from time to time. Earlier he figured meeting Julian at ten would have given them too much time together, but now it didn't seem like he had enough. If he was going to be a part of this project he wanted to go over everything from scheduling to costumes so he'd have a very clear idea of what exactly he had agreed to sign up for.

Just then a roar of familiar laughter caught Kurt's attention. To his left he saw Finn and Rachel walking arm in arm across the courtyard, Finn leading the way and Rachel laughing hysterically on her cell phone. Rachel waved excitedly when she caught sight of him, yanking Finn unexpectedly off course and dragging him to the ice rink.

"Hey Rach-" Kurt began, but was silenced with a smile and a raise of her finger.

"Hey," Finn sighed, rubbing his hand through his hair while his girlfriend continued to drabble animatedly on her phone.

"What are you two doing out so late?" Kurt asked.

Finn held up a handful of shopping bags. "I was duped into Christmas shopping. Rachel promised dinner afterwards."

"But you already ate dinner."

"No offense dude, but those heart-healthy meals just don't hit the spot like a burger from Breadsticks. Just… don't tell Burt or my mom. I don't want to hurt their feelings."

Kurt smiled. If anything his dad would have asked why Finn hadn't picked him up something too. "None taken, but if Rachel keeps running her mouth with the velocity of a motorboat I don't see how she'll ever manage to get her lips to calm down enough to ever eat again. Who's she talking to anyway?"

Finn shrugged. "Beats me, she's been on the phone for the last hour. I tried to keep up with the conversation but she lost me when she started talking about Hanukkah and stuff. Anyway, what are you doing out here?"

Kurt hesitated. If he didn't think Finn would tell Rachel about Julian's film he might have told him the truth, or at least part of it, but Finn was notoriously bad at keeping secrets. Rachel would freak if she discovered Kurt was doing any sort of production without her, even if it was just some stupid college film. What if she insisted on being a part of it too? Would Julian allow it? Kurt didn't think so, but Rachel's ambition could often turn persuasive, and then what would happen? He didn't think he'd be able to handle both Julian and Rachel at the same time.

"I'm on a date," he lied, praying Finn wouldn't pry for too many details.

"Date. Right, that's cool. Where's Blaine?"

"Blaine? Oh he's just over there… grabbing ice-skates. We're going skating."

Finn squinted at the rink behind them. "That's cool I guess," he said slowly, sparing a fleeting glance at Rachel before leaning closer to Kurt and dropping his voice. "Hey uh, do you mind holding off until we leave? Don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with ice skating but Rachel might want to join you guys and I, uh, I can't skate. Plus I'm really looking forward to that burger. Just tell Blaine to hang back until we leave, okay?"

Kurt nodded and pressed his lips into a tight smile. "No problem."

He was spared the embarrassment of pretending to text Blaine when Rachel hung up with a loud sigh and smiled. "Well, that went well!"

"What went well?" Finn asked.

"Well Finn, while you've been busy throwing your money away on presents as a token of your gratitude for your loved ones this Christmas, I believe I've found something that truly embodies the meaning of love and the spirit of giving for the holidays. I'd rather not give away too many details until I clear everything with my dads, with us being Jewish and all, but let's just say that this Christmas Eve is going to be absolutely unforgettable!"

"Wait a minute," Finn frowned. "Weren't you the one who asked me to take _you_ shopping?"

Rachel dismissed him with a wave of her hand and continued as if she hadn't heard him. "Out of everyone I'm inviting I think you're going to enjoy it the most Kurt, since you're the only one of my peers who even comes close to appreciating my impeccable taste in music. I know you don't have any idea of what I'm talking about, but I can only imagine the excitement you must be feeling," she clapped, sparing a glance at the skating rink before smiling broadly. "Oh and don't worry, Blaine can come too. I was debating on only inviting the members of our glee club to keep tradition, but I'm willing to make an exception in your case. Anyway, we really should be heading off. Don't worry, I'll keep you both posted on the big surprise; trust me it's to _die for!"_

"To die for?" a cool voice purred from somewhere close behind. "That's an awfully serious promise coming from such a frivolous girl, don't you think?"

Kurt turned to find Julian leaning against the railing of the rink, camera in hand, and suddenly the world around him froze. Maybe the stunned state Karofsky's invite had left him in before was to blame, or maybe it was because having Finn and Rachel in his presence somehow made him more real, but there was something about the way Julian looked right now that made Kurt feel as if he were seeing him for the very first time… and it took his breath away.

What few snowflakes there were seemed to hang loosely in mid-air around him, their magnificent sparkle painting his dark features in a captivating shimmer. He stared pointedly passed Kurt at Rachel, his blistering eyes gleaming with the soft reflection of the Christmas lights above, and Kurt made a promise to himself never to stare into them too long for fear of catching fire. His dark hair glistened as well, each glossy strand sticking out playfully from a beanie that slouched too far from his hairline. Kurt wondered briefly if he was late because he had taken a shower, but the mud on his skinny jeans and jacket proved otherwise. Still, Julian practically glittered with water and fire and something else Kurt couldn't quite put his finger on because it was hard to tell if the squirming sensation in the pit of his stomach was the batting of butterfly wings or the scuttling of spiders.

Rachel's face thawed of excitement and crumbled itself in confusion. "I'm sorry, I-"

"Well Rachel I think we better get going if you wanna grab a bite to eat." Finn said loudly, clapping a hand on her shoulder and glancing uneasily between Kurt and Julian. "It's uh… it's almost twelve dude so don't stay out too much longer, your dad gets pretty upset when you get home late. Um yeah so… see ya later."

Kurt swallowed hard as he watched Finn and Rachel disappear across the courtyard, both sparing curious glances at Julian over their shoulders and talking lowly with their heads together. Once he was positive they were out of earshot Kurt crossed his arms and turned back to Julian. "You're late," he scoffed.

A smile crept across Julian's face that set the hair on the back of Kurt's neck on end. "And you waited."

"Look Julian, if you're going to make this a habit then you can count me out right now. I have better things to do with my time than to sit around and wait for you."

"I assure you, you don't." Julian smiled, holding out a pair of worn skates. "Here, put these on. The pickings were slim but we can exchange them if you need a smaller size," he cooed, cocking an eyebrow at Kurt's crotch.

"I'm not going skating with you," Kurt cringed, more at the thought of doing something recreational with Julian than how many sweaty feet had been inside the skates before they were offered to him.

"Come now Kurt, I already paid for the both of us. This date won't work very well if I'm stuck skating around in there while you're sitting out here."

"Who said anything about this being a date?"

"You did, just now to your friend. Unless you lied to him, which wasn't a very nice thing to do. You're not the type of guy who lies to his friends, are you Kurt?"

With a hard stare Kurt swiped the skates from his hands and sat at a nearby picnic table. "I have to be home by midnight," he sneered, tossing the skates onto the table and scooting slightly to the left when Julian took the seat opposite of him.

"Tsk tsk… And here I was under the impression that Blaine had actually found a man of royalty. What are you really wearing under all that silk and rhinestones Cinderella? Overalls?"

Kurt glared at him and set to work unlacing his skates.

"Were your friends a ruse as well? You don't seem the type to talk to mice, so I have to assume that the boy is an artificial tree. And who was the girl, your fairy godmother? Seeing how she speaks with such nonsense I can't imagine her being anything else-"

"I don't want you talking to my friends anymore," Kurt snapped.

Julian folded his arms on the table and rested his chin on the back of his hands. "Because you're ashamed of me?" he pouted, peering up at Kurt innocently through his lashes.

Kurt grounded his teeth. "No, because it's confusing. They don't know who you are and I'd like to keep it that way."

"So you admit you're a liar?"

"There's a difference between lying and keeping something a secret," Kurt sighed impatiently.

Julian's pout slid from his lips, his eyes racking intently over Kurt's face. "I'll have to keep that in mind," he said lowly.

Kurt stopped messing with his laces and caught Julian's eye. "I didn't come here to talk about my friends, Julian. I came here to talk about your project."

With a quick furrow of his eyebrows Julian sat up and spit onto the ground beside him. "What do you want to know?"

"Considering I know next to nothing I think everything would be a good place to start."

Julian took his own skates from around his neck and placed them onto the table next to his camera. Kurt watched as he began fiddling with the laces. "We all have dreams, don't you agree? Something we aspire to be when we get older, something we think will give us some sort of sense of accomplishment in this mundane excuse for a world. Until Blaine left I didn't realize I had a dream… but I do. For your sake let's call it directing. I'm not saying I'm good at it, or even good enough to make it for that matter, but if I don't try I'm doomed to live a life of _what ifs_." He pulled one end of the lace from its hole and spun it between his index finger and his thumb, admiring the aglet diligently as it flailed above his fingertips. "I'm a man of many phrases Kurt, but I refuse to let those words be one of them. I'm not going to languish beneath them like the rest of the people in this godforsaken state, settling on minimum wage and plasma TVs and ungrateful children with a wife who's fucked her way into plastic surgery for the man she's cheating on you with. _What ifs_ are for the weak, Kurt. They're the two words nearly every man around here dies with hidden under their tongue. It's the _I tried's_ that make living worth your while."

Kurt hung onto his every word, captivated against his will. It was like staring intently into a bonfire and realizing there was so much more to it than just the flames. There were dark cracks and crevasses and the pieces of wood that glowed like faces in between. There were blankets of grey ash and pulsing embers that cracked away from time to time, flying high above the reach of the flames like fireflies, and before you know it you're in a trance that you can't recall slipping into but don't really care to come out of.

"The project is a demo reel. Nothing spectacular, just forty five minutes… but every minute has to count. It's due in three weeks so I don't have much time for filming, what with the editing and all, and I need an actor who's on top of their game; no reshoots, no rewrites, and no questions. You at least seem punctual enough to rely on."

"So I'm the only actor?" Kurt asked, although he had a feeling he already knew the answer.

Julian mused over the laces of his skates as he pulled them from their holes and began weaving them back inside. "The story only calls for one."

Kurt swallowed hard. "And what's the story?"

The question hung between them like a fog and it wasn't until he began to feel light headed that Kurt found he was holding his breath. Without any auditions or any idea of his persona Julian insisted that he was the only person there was to play the leading role. What was the story behind the role, and what made him so perfect for it?

Kurt could feel a mist of sweat forming on his brow as he studied the smirk that danced on the corner of Julian's lips, the scratch of cotton and polyester against tiny metal grommets feeding his tension.

Maybe he didn't want to know the answer. Maybe it would be best to back out now while he still had a fragment of a chance. Because with the story came Julian's intentions. Even without voicing it Kurt could tell he was less than pleased that Blaine had found a boyfriend… What if the role was subjecting or demeaning? Could Julian have strung his story together in such a way that he could get a decent demo reel while humiliating Kurt at the same time?

"Just a modern twist on a classic," Julian said with a click of his tongue, jolting Kurt from his thoughts.

"And what classic might that be?" he asked, returning his fingers to his own laces in an effort to look as nonchalant as Julian.

"Jekyll and Hyde."

Kurt's head snapped up. Surely he must have heard him wrong. Doctor Jekyll was one of the most demanding characters to ever graze the silver screen. The role called for a powerful display of masculinity and a cunning ability to make his deranged counterpart believable as his own character. Julian was crazy to think he could pull it off.

"Jekyll and Hyde?"

"I see you've picked up on some of Blaine's more irritating habits," Julian said with another click of his tongue. "Yes, Jekyll and Hyde… Surely you've heard of it?"

"Of course I have," Kurt spat hysterically. "That doesn't explain why you want me to lead."

Julian looked up from his laces. "I wasn't aware there was any explaining to be done," he said, the expression on his face teetering on the border of confusion and amusement. "Such a profound role would throw any respectable actor to their knees just begging for a chance to take it. If anything I assumed you'd be excited."

"Have you even _seen _Jekyll and Hyde? Or read it for that matter? How can you possibly approach someone like me with a straight face and insist that I play the lead?"

Julian shrugged. "Because you'll be perfect," he said simply, returning to his skates.

"You're crazy."

"Never said I wasn't, puddin."

Kurt gaped at him in disbelief. "You can't throw such a demanding role in my face and expect me to pull it off perfectly," he snapped. "It'll take weeks for me to get the pitch of my voice right for Jekyll alone, months for Hyde."

"Well luckily for both of us the role is silent."

Kurt frowned. "I don't follow."

"That's the beauty of adaptations Kurt; you can make them into whatever you want them to be." Julian peered up at him regally. "In this case the role is silent. The whole film is actually, save a running of scores that'll compliment the story arc. All I need is your pretty face... Your ugly one would help too," he winked.

Kurt closed his eyes and rubbed his temple, his frenzied nerves eroding into a headache. "Why me?" he asked.

"Why not?"

"I don't think I'm what you're looking for, Julian."

"What makes you think you have any idea what I'm looking for?"

"If you're doing Jekyll and Hyde I have a pretty good idea. You need someone who will at least look the part of a brooding nineteenth century bachelor," Kurt plopped his elbow on the table and leaned his head onto his hand with a weighted sigh. "If anything I'd make for a better Lucy. Why don't you ask someone from the football team? I'm sure they'll be way more capable of pulling off a deranged madman than I will."

Julian shook his head with a chuckle. "My god Kurt, how many times have you've been told no?"

"What do you mean?"

"How many plays have you auditioned for?"

Kurt narrowed his eyes. "One," he said suspiciously. "West Side Story, earlier this year."

"And who did you want to play?" Julian sing-songed.

"Tony," Kurt said slowly.

"And who did you end up playing?" Julian sang again.

Kurt hesitated. "Officer Krupke."

Julian set down his skate and folded his hands, his leisured demeanor suddenly turning serious. "Did they tell you why you didn't get Tony?"

"They said I wasn't masculine enough… A friend of my stepbrother's got the role instead."

"And how did that make you feel?"

Kurt's jaw laxed in disbelief. Just twenty minutes ago he figured he and Julian would be at each other's throats by now, not having a therapy session over shoelaces.

"How do you think it made me feel?" he snapped.

"Judging by your startling lack of self-confidence I assume it left you belittled, which is pretty pathetic."

"Pathetic?" Kurt sputtered. "Well how would you feel if someone told you-"

"So you have a pretty face and a high voice," Julian spoke sternly. "That doesn't mean you're doomed to play feminine roles for the rest of your life; it just means you have to put in more effort. If you want a role then go for it. Own it, work hard at it… twist it to make it yours. It shouldn't matter if you aspire to be Louis de Pointe du Lac or Mr. T; if you feel like you have it in you to pull something off then do it. Fuck what everyone else says."

"It's not that simple…" Kurt began, but Julian cut him off.

"Unless you honestly mean to tell me that you don't think you're talented enough to do this, I don't see what the big deal is, Kurt. Don't start making excuses about the way you look either. Your innocent features will make for a heart wrenching Jekyll and I can tell by the way you look at me that you'll be more than capable of pulling off Hyde."

Kurt's shoulders stiffened in an effort to keep himself from shooting Julian another pointed glare.

"We've taken away your only endeavor… what's left to hold you back?"

Kurt chewed on his bottom lip as he considered this. Without having to worry about manipulating his voice he might be able to pull it off. In fact he was almost certain he could. Still…

"Jesus, look around you Kurt. You're stuck in some no-name town in the middle of an even poorer excuse for a state. Nothing you've been handed here can challenge your potential more than this. Think of it as an opportunity… Not just for my future but for yours. You want to be a star someday, don't you? Where else are you going to get this sort of practice if not right here, right now, with me?"

Julian's words struck Kurt like a slap across the face. He was right. About everything. Nothing here challenged him in the slightest. Not glee club, not theater, not even his classes. If he wanted to prove he was worthy of being accepted into NYADA and getting out of this poor excuse for a town then this was his best option. No, it wasn't a typical piece to include in his resume, but it was unique, and if he could pull it off then he'd be set far above the rest of the applicants.

With a hard swallow Kurt nodded. "Fine… I'll do it. But I have conditions."

Julian turned his head and spat. "I had a feeling you might."

"Filming… can't get in the way of school or glee. I have rehearsal until four and homework after, so I can only work with you from six to eleven, midnight at the latest."

Julian propped his foot up on the bench and slid off his shoe. "Go on."

"If there's anything in the script that makes me uncomfortable I want the right to refuse it… or to request a compromise at least."

"I'm sure you'll find the script to your liking. You can read over it tonight and point out any concerns when we get together tomorrow. Next condition?"

"Let me be in charge of costumes and make-up."

"That won't be necessary," Julian chuckled. "This is a _modern_ retelling, or have you forgotten?"

"You want a believable Hyde, don't you? My face expressions alone aren't going to pull it off. I'm going to need shadows and liners to emphasize his features. Not to mention the long standing art of presenting a character's personality through his wardrobe… be it hoodies or suits it has to be well thought out."

Julian spat again. "As long as you understand that I retain full control over this project then I don't see why not."

"Of course," Kurt breathed, a trickle of excitement running down his spine as a million possibilities flashed through his head.

"Anything else?"

Kurt lifted his gaze to the swirl of lights above the rink, his excitement dwindling. Earlier it seemed as if he had an entire novel of conditions. Now he could barely come up with four.

"I don't want to tell anyone about this," he muttered finally. "Not my friends or my family… I want you to promise you'll keep this between us."

Skate intact, Julian set down his foot with a thud. "If you insist. What about Blaine?"

Kurt narrowed his eyes. "Would he find out regardless?"

"Depends."

"On what?"

"Why it matters."

Kurt let out a deep sigh. "The last time we were together Blaine was under the impression that I thought he was going to cheat on me… with you."

Julian cocked his head to the side. "Did he now?"

"I wasn't of course," Kurt said stiffly. "But he said something else that caught me off guard."

"And what might that have been?" Julian asked lowly.

_If anything, I'm the one who should be worried about you running off with him._

Although Kurt was sure the thought was nothing more than a feeble attempt on Blaine's part to reassure him that he wasn't going to cheat on him with Julian, it unnerved him nonetheless. If Julian let it slip that they were working on something as time consuming as a film together before Kurt mustered up the courage to tell Blaine himself, he was sure his boyfriend would become suspicious… and then what would Kurt say? That he's only doing this to get rid of Julian as fast as possible, and the only reason he never told Blaine was because he didn't want him to interfere?

Even if he could convince Blaine to believe him, his feelings would get hurt either way.

"It's just… If Blaine has to know that we're working together I want to be the one to tell him. He deserves that much."

Julian studied him with amusement, his dark eyes flickering with thoughts Kurt didn't care for him to make known. "Fine, you have my word. Anything else?"

Kurt shook his head.

"Then what are you waiting for?" Julian asked, throwing his sneakers onto the table and making his way to the rink.

* * *

><p>It was only with great effort that Kurt replaced his designer boots with the droopy ice skates. He walked carefully to the rink, the weight of Julian's stare making him question his balance more than the uneven concrete beneath his blades.<p>

"Careful now," Julian called when he stepped onto the ice. "I wouldn't want to worry about you falling and cracking that fragile skin of yours."

Kurt tilted his nose high into the air and sailed passed him with long, confident strides. "Please. Coming from someone who ranked number one in Allen County's junior male figure skating division four years in a row, I think the only thing you should be worrying about is keeping up," he sneered over his shoulder.

Julian watched him skate past with reserve before chuckling lowly and taking off to catch up with him.

The two glided in silence alongside each other, the scraping of their blades stimulating Kurt's tension. As they looped around the edge of the rink he became acutely aware of how alone they were. There was no one else in the rink apart from him and Julian and the earlier sea of shoppers had thinned out to only a few late night stragglers. Somewhere above them a speaker began playing a scratchy male cover of 'Once Upon a Dream.' If he were with Blaine right now the faint glow of the sagging lights above and the echoed lullaby may have been romantic, but Kurt wasn't with Blaine, he was with Julian, and any amorous air the ice rink may have held was now nothing short of eerie.

"I'm waiting." Julian purred.

"For what?"

"For you to tell me about your day."

"I wasn't aware I was expected to." Kurt said with a quirk of his eyebrow.

"Well if you're going to tell me anything about yourself I figure it'd be a good place to start."

"Why would I tell you anything about myself?" the question slipped out too quickly and with too much desperation. Julian examined Kurt with tremendous amusement.

"Is it a crime to want to know the people you work with?" he asked.

"I just assumed-"

"That you would be exempt? Dating Blaine doesn't give you any more merit than anyone else I may have asked to do this, you know. I don't know how other directors you've worked under did things, but I can assure you that my methods will be completely different."

Kurt studied him from the corner of his eye, "Different how?"

"Well I need you to be open with me for starters. If I don't know anything about you then how can I know what to expect from your performance? Besides, for all I know you could be a child molester or something."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Please. Do I look like a child molester?"

"Oh puddin," Julian chuckled, swiping his beanie from his head and running a hand through his hair. "You know just as well as I do how deceiving looks can be."

Kurt swallowed hard, willing himself not to lose his composure. He knew Julian was purposely trying to make him nervous and that he should just ignore him, but simply knowing better didn't keep his lungs from constricting whenever he caught his eye or his skin from crawling every time he spoke.

"Fine," he breathed. "I went to school and did some homework. Nothing noteworthy."

"You're right, it's not. What else?"

"Apart from waiting around in the blistering cold for you? Nothing." Kurt snapped.

A slow smile crept over Julian's face. "You don't trust me."

For lack of a better response Kurt cleared his throat. "What makes you say that?"

"I can sense it in the way you hold yourself. You're guarded. A little too guarded for someone who shouldn't know anything about me."

Kurt turned his gaze to the glowing trees outside the courtyard, hoping against odds that keeping his focus on anything but Julian might somehow make this more bearable.

"I know about Eric," he muttered.

"Then you should know that what happened to him was an accident."

"Oh really? And I suppose Misha was an accident too?"

"Misha got what was coming to him. Damn yorkie always did like to weasel itself under the gate."

"It's neck was snapped in half," Kurt said sharply.

"The rat _drowned_. It got caught on a branch in the river and the current broke its neck. There was nothing we could do to save him."

"What about Cottingham? All the fights you got Blaine into?"

"Fucking Patricia," Julian chuckled with a shake of his head. "Let me make something very clear to you. Being at Cottingham wasn't easy for Blaine. Frankly I don't see how he survived his first year. Any fights you may have heard of all boiled down to self-defense. If someone was giving Blaine problems I brought it upon myself to step in and correct them. Lord knows Blaine wasn't going to do anything about it. Maybe it wasn't the right thing to do, and yeah I'll even go so far as to admit that sometimes I went a little overboard, but you can't possibly judge me for protecting my best friend in the only way I knew how."

Kurt studied him suspiciously. "If you're telling the truth, and it was all to protect Blaine, then why did you break his arm before he transferred? Why did he come home with bruises every day?"

Julian spat onto the rink. "Friends get into fights all the time."

"I don't believe you."

"Have I given any reason not to?" Julian asked, his voice a little unsteady, and Kurt wondered if he had struck some sort of nerve.

It was a while before Julian spoke again. When he did it was with such a quiet sincerity that Kurt found it hard to believe that it was still Julian he was talking to.

"Being close to me… used to come with a price. I had a hard time controlling my emotions, and Blaine tended to get the short end of the stick. Never because I hated him… no it was never out of hate. It was because I cared for him too much. He just _knew_ how to get under my skin without even realizing it. Always full of questions but never questioning the things that mattered." Julian sneered. "Like people. He was too eager to make friends, too quick to trust someone without questioning their motives… He got hurt a lot. I tried to be there as much as possible but there were times when I'd come around and he'd just be so quiet and I knew something was wrong. _ Someone stole my lunch money, I lent my new headphones to so and so and they sold them to another student, someone tripped me on the track field and I sprung my ankle._ Oh I'd get so mad. At the time I figured hurting him would toughen him up but it wasn't tuff love he needed… it was yours."

Julian peered up at Kurt with such a startling mixture of regret and affirmation that Kurt nearly lost his balance.

"Mine?" he asked breathlessly.

"Yes, yours," Julian spat onto the ice again, reverting slowly to his casual disposition. "He's changed so much since the last time I saw him. Too much for my liking… but I have to admit it's for the better. You've been seeing him for what, roughly a year? How is it that in such a short amount of time you've been able to give him the strength I never could?"

Kurt bit his lip. "I didn't realize I had," he whispered.

"So modest about it too… I think I'm starting to understand what Blaine sees in you."

Kurt slowed his momentum. There was so much about Blaine he never knew. And how could he? Blaine had never let on that he had been treated so badly before. Even when pressed he would brush it off with a playful nudge of Kurt's shoulder and insist that it was nothing he wasn't able to handle. But he never had to handle it, did he? That's what Julian was for. Julian, with all his secrets and stories and knowledge of everything that Kurt couldn't even pretend to understand.

All at once Kurt felt as if he were dating a complete stranger.

"Julian I… I think I need to head home."

"Did I upset you?" Julian's voice was filled with concern, but there was no denying the shadow of a smirk that lurked on the corner of his lips.

"It's just… it's getting late. I need to be back before my father gets worried."

Julian held out his hand. "Once more around the rink," he said, eyes glittering from the lights above and with something else Kurt couldn't quite place.

Kurt stared warily at his outstretched hand. "I really don't think-"

"Don't make me say please, Kurt. I have a pretty impressive track record to maintain." Julian chuckled. "Think of it as our special way of sealing the deal; not with a handshake but with a dance."

Kurt's lips were just beginning to part in protest when his eyes lit up with a sudden notion. "I have one more condition," he breathed.

Julian cocked his head to the side. "And what might that be?"

"You want me to open up to you, right? Well I want you to open up to me too... About Blaine."

"About Blaine?" Julian cooed, his interest peaking.

"Y-Yes... I want to know everything. About his past I mean."

"Why can't Blaine tell you himself?"

Kurt lowered his eyes, a thousand answers stabbing at his heart like daggers. _Because he won't. Because he'll brush it off like it doesn't matter. Because he never feels like talking about it. Because it hurts too much to talk about. _

_Because he doesn't want me to know._

"I'd just rather hear it from you," he muttered.

Julian studied him closely. "I see," he said slowly, the words dripping like venom from his lips. "Anything else?"

Kurt shook his head, a thick trickle of guilt staining his spine. "Just this."

With a small smile Julian held out his hand again. Slowly Kurt took it.

They stood together, trapped somewhere between the soft glow of the white lights above and the menacing breath of the ice below, with nothing to anchor them to each other but a slippery grip and a trembled agreement, and Kurt had never felt the threat of suffocating quite like this before.

Because now there was no going back. Now he was completely at Julian's mercy. And as the loudspeaker overhead droned out another repeat of 'Once Upon a Dream' and Julian began dragging him across the rink, Kurt felt as if there was a greater part of him being taken with Julian than just his hand.

"Relax," Julian smiled, placing his other hand on the small of Kurt's back. "This'll be fun."


End file.
